Grains of sand in my desert.

New site about diamonds

2011-10-31T15:42:00.000-04:00

i got a new site started about diamond rings, it's gonna be about everything diamond rings , how to choose diamond rings, how to craft diamond rings, how to design diamond rings, and which diamond ring is right

Come check it out and contribute on my diamond rings for sale site, at http://diamondringsforsale.org

Sea, sex, and sun... or just rubbing your feet in the sand.

2011-09-30T11:37:00.003-04:00

So my beach blog, about the best, and cheapest beach holidays is growing tremendously, and i've been writing articles about my past experiences in beaches around the world.

I'm gonna add the option of vacation booking soon, to allow you to book through me! and get great deals to some of the worlds hottest destinations.

I'll keep you posted here, on where to go and what to do. When i get it!

Adventures, of my on the beach holidays

2011-06-21T10:24:00.002-04:00

I will be posting my adventures discoveries, and experiences, how to make the most of your trip and locations to curious travelers at my on the beach holidays website from now on.

From the Americas to Europe, you will discover what experiences i've had, with the culture, people and lands... what beauties i've discovered and how i enjoyed it without leaving an arm and a leg over there.

I'll discuss activities i've tried including diving, snorkeling, flying! It's all there, so definitely go check it out, leave a comment, and tell us about your experiences around the world.

2009-11-27T22:40:00.000-05:00

fuck that stereolove song makes me wanna go to fucking greece
get the fuck out of this rotten cheapass fuckweather town
go somewhere with sun, somewhere there is no bitches because all the bitches are hot and they're NOT bitches!
somewhere with sea, booze, music, all year long
every night is better than the next, and last night was the best!

These months' elations

2009-11-16T23:35:00.002-05:00

I was fingering two extremely hot girls simultaneously as i fed them each others private juices. I came out of the café i was hanging out with friends at, and left them to check this trendier, hotter place out. As I would grope one girl's ass i pulled the other's hair, to hear her moan and make her face look like an orgasm.
I barely kissed either, when i did one, she wanted to know more about my fingers on her lips than my lips on hers.
I didnt know their name either.
We were grinding in a bar on the main, and her ass shivered as i slid my fingers beneath her underwear.

The trick here is that i came in to enjoy better music, and it showed. I was in the mood to party, that's what i let the first girl know, she was here to dance alone, and told me so. She asked me for my name, a graduate she was, nice young lady, with some guy and girlfriends there, all in all.
I don't know much else because I'm mostly deaf, but it just was good social proof for me, i wasn't some random perv with cherry t-shirt walking into a student bar to pick up my prey anymore, rather i became a sociable guy, here for a party but up for a chat. I left her; "gotta join my friends, later".

The first place was still crap, the music just got worst, and now i had random chick tell me i looked totally blasé, indifferent. Fock dat. I let her know it's crap as i tried to dance with her, to notice she was already with some guys, so i just dragged my friend out of there and brought him to the other bar.

Now with the power 2, i didn't at all look like a looser, and i talk too, i finally had all the pussy i could grab. And such i did. After a moment of excited dancing, and making myself noticed (unintentionally, i do it for fun...that's how it's best done), i spin and grind a shorty, and notice she's very much inviting my hand to get under her skirt. Exactly where i want it.

Her friends appeared out of the darkness, to greet me with a hungry "hi", as one of them joined my other leg. It wasn't luck, rather i unconsciously always have this blasé look inside of me, and it shows! This indifference is the source of my recent success in fingering chicks, because my concern is enjoying the mood more than her pussy. This however is also the source of me not laying these chicks, i tame my sexual intentions, to allow myself to enjoy the moment. This turns out to be a long term loss for me.

I hereby resolve to allow my indifference to take over my actions, and inversely my intentions to take over my subconscious.

This means i gotta ask the chick to come with me somewhere we can have more intimacy, when i feel that.
That's a weeks worth, i wont go on about last week, but it's the same story, slightly different, same failed ending.
Not anymore though. Now im going in for the jackpot.

Euphoria

2009-09-27T13:25:00.002-04:00

Every time i imagine myself having a conversation with someone, its really a long monologue, kind of like these blog posts, and this monologue is uninterrupted, and increasingly interesting. I guess i could do the same, and i have, in my real life conversations.. that would put make it seem like i'm leading the conversation, but i surely would loose the interest of the person eventually.

Nonetheless sometimes when i talk too much i open up too much, and this probably makes me look weak at points. Is there a problem with seeming weak? No, it's a common property in all human beings. There is however a problem in seeming weak in your initial conversation with a person. So i should focus on asking more questions.

I've resolved to perhaps hang out in social places a bit more in the immediate future so that i may practice my talking, and conversational skills instead of lurking around grabbing easy preys on the dance floor thanks to my height, and perhaps nice fashion.

I should also right down a list of what really describes me, and these characteristics i always imagine myself talking about that way i can sum them up quickly in a necessary intro.

Also i should have a list of quick values to communicate immediately when i'm talking to a chick i've just met.

I notice that these lists are things we've all done in elementary school, highschool and whenever in our education, in the language and communicative courses at least, so that we would know ourselves, however i, and probably many of you are amongst those who did this with some detachment. It is however important work so i should do it now.

This is 2009, and Slim's back again

2009-09-20T18:42:00.002-04:00

My last ventures in night clubs have been great.
Make out after make out, hugs, kisses, chicks opening me, omgwtflol ... nothing new though.. right?

i will say one thing that did change: I can really feel that nature's "maturing process" is having an effect on me, you know.. how your personality changes as you get older, the way you act, do things.

I wish i could tell you all you have to do is wait till you mature and things will turn out great for you in terms of women, but that's not it. I have a natural ambition to have physical contact with women (grind) and make out with her, i can't help it, and it's both helping and damaging my game.

For one, when i start making out, i think what happens is that i trigger a belief mechanism in my mind that the game has been won, and i don't really need to do anything more but make out.

That's wrong, because my ultimate goal should be to make out with her other set of lips.

And even that's just the animalistic, instinctive goal. The true goal i wish to reach in order to have a sense of self fulfillment is to actually be able to have her naturally connect with me, as well as to have a natural connection with her.

I like to write all this down because i can see these goals and what i have to do to get there, the biggest problem is internalizing this knowledge, and turning it into beliefs, like i've done it for make outs... it used to be i wouldn't know what to do with an attractive girl in a nightclub.

I must reiterate the basic principles that i might sometimes forget when trying to attract girls, and trying to seduce them: do not seem needy, BUT you must have a mission, i mean by that that you need to do something at all times, and it can't just be trying to get the girl! don't confuse having fun, and getting the girl, you want to have fun, her lips/body will probably help, just go for having fun however you can (dance, cheer, be happy dont worry) and if she feels you're in the mood she will want to share fun with you, and from there you can get physical with her and both have fun sexually, or even just a makeout.

Ok so that's it for today, see you soon, hopefully before next year lol.

That being said

2008-11-30T11:25:00.003-05:00

My complete indifference towards social standards is now turning me into a social outcast, or more clearly a bum.
Everything has it's time and place, and i'm not going to talk about personal issues with people i don't know or who will react awkwardly to it. Even if the problem is with them and not me, i should use that knowledge to my advantage. As such i will also stop alcohol once again, too much money wasted, too many wrong things said and done.
However i will keep, and reenforce my openness, but not my invasiveness. To do that i'll just be more indifferent to people's reactions, after having adapted my own self-controls listed above.
It's time for change... for me too.

No more BS now

2008-09-06T11:58:00.002-04:00

I lived my summer expensively, dispensing money sin after sin, I allowed myself to get anything i so desired and kept pushing the limits of my *taboos* everytime. And i ignored the value of money.
But now i've reached the top, i paid for things i never could morally conceive, and i paid way to much. I've lived what i had to live and now is time for me to start thinking morally and logically again.

With that said, i've set my goals for now.

As for what concerns women, and probably most aspects of ones lives, i can't have shame expressing my desires! If i do so, not only will i not reach my goal for meeting women for example, but i will do it in secrecy in every which way i can and that is bad. You might as well be an over sexual pervert and that is the image you project, then keep to your self and in your spare time keep in the shadows to go to stripclubs and places that sell sex to the ashamed just to pay for services you can get for free.

I'm going to break this trough in my performance, and now i'm going to stop this bullshit, and get clear with myself... Be aggressive in my desires, and display it. I'm going back to the begining of this year.

I've had the experiences i had this summer... and now it's time to put these away and start fresh.

?

2008-06-11T20:53:00.004-04:00

Today i died and i was born again, as days go by my life seems more and more like a Hollywood flick... a fictional story.
I get a taste of both the happy and sad endings.

But where did it begin, when does it end?

Dramatic changes like these don't make me change my life goals anymore.. what affects me now?
When will they tell me im due to die again?
When will i near complete unconsciousness again...

Should i not enjoy everyday like i have been?
I've lived like ill die tomorrow my whole life, and dream like ill live forever.

Bad club good club

2008-06-08T14:59:00.002-04:00

Clubs change frequently in Montreal, but as of today here is my how i evaluate some clubs, based how socially open the customers are, the staff, the general perception one can have of it (looks, sound, feeling).

Opera - Very good, probably the best, it hasnt failed me yet, and the people inside are all nice.
La Mouche - I've only been once so far, but it is extremely promising, the crowd is very varied but mentally mature, and appreciable.

737 - Utter crap. The only reason you could go there is for the view outside, but since 2 years of having gone there, it is always the same crap. Very occasionally you'll find reasonable people there. But NOT on the main dancefloor (second floor) it is OVER Crowded, and they definitely should lower the capacity. The ratio is 8 guys for 2 girls, and it Stinks. There is only one fan in the main dancefloor and everyone shoves each other to get there. DO NOT GO. The crowd is young and snobby. If you intend to go pick up there, don't intend to talk much. Just go complete rapist-caveman style, ignore everything she will say/do. I advocate being very firm in your physical approach (not strong as in hirting her.. but Firm). And keeping a happy mood. and ignoring her rejection shit tests.

La boom - there is better circulation then 737 but it's more or less the same type of people, except they are more receptive, i've had more success here with the women, and their's often young ladies wanting to experiment, so i'd say this is probably one of the better clubs for younger girls. (16-20)

Cafe campus - Not my style

Radio lounge -

Ballroom - love story, great DJ, great crowd, a bit old for me, but still i love it, especially nice staff.

Lite ultraclub - light...

Katrina - hahahahhaha just for fuck's sake lol. But ya this is like a super last last resort to a fucked evening, if you want to just go caveman ballistic on tourists from outerspace, people who go in there have no idea how crappy it is. Else they wouldn't.

1234 - How good or bad this is Varries so much, ..... .

Tribe - i love it, a bit small though, on thursdays the crowds are nice.

I'll continue these summaries in due time.

What's been up

2008-05-10T20:09:00.003-04:00

Last times i went out i've been doing a lot of "cavemanning" as they call it, that is just picking up the girl off the floor and virtually rapping her on the dance floor.
That's my approach, because i have nothing to say and i don't say anything, so as long as she doesnt reject me before hand and i go up to dancing with her, then i'll caveman her.

A lot, recently, i've been getting approached.. by random girls/women. My rate has gone up drastically to about 3/day on average in the last week. (varying from none to 7 per day!)

The approaches i've been getting vary from a simple "salut" (hi) to the more frequent "you're tall", and even some girls who wanted to say something a bit more researched than just wow you're tall and so they'll try to say it subtly or find a way not to show immediate interest.

I've been unable to react significantly when i get approached, and my canned *bold* responses are treated as insulting remarks these days!

From my thinking about these situations i've concluded that the response has to be as natural, and just a normal reaction to the person as if i'd known them for a while. So i have to train myself to ignore whatever is *inhibitive* in me to react as i would normally.

These days i've also been using a lot of the same lines (original, and my own, but the same ones over and over again) and as time goes by it seems they get out of date and do not have the same spike and effect as they would the first time. Its all about the personality, something i lack as of late because i've been traumatised by the definition of maturity, and i'm overreacting to it these days, so that i consider every thing that i havent seen done before as *immature*, but it shouldn't be that way, i have to learn to let go... and be myself.

Night out 2k8

2008-01-28T18:11:00.001-05:00

So i've decided to summarize my outings here so as not to spam the other place i would write them.

Last night i went to opera to close up 3 days of intense clubbing, the club is pretty amazing, it's two floors, with an open balcony from the second onto the first, you can see everything it looks very grandiose and classy. The DJ was excellent, mixing all the good house/electro classics and top pop's just right. There were moments of dull music of course, to give everybody a rest.

I started dancing early not too far from a 2-3 set of fairly hot chicks dancing while the floor was still pretty empty. They were giving me good proximity etc. I hi-5'd should have spun one of them and extended arm danced. The white one that is (latina i believe, just the way i luv em). She was accompanied by two girls who looked like they would leave her alone with me ... I guess we'll never know.

Then there was a long period of dull music while the DJs changed probably, and the dancefloor nonetheless started filling up, the chicks more around the front area near the stairs.

I basically tried my standard get in the picture frame thing when cameras popped out, but i wasnt bold enough to place myself right where i needed to be.

At one point i did though, had a little back and forth with one girl, her friend was super grumpy (super huge tits though). The girl explains to me that her friend is pissed because some guy named pablo or something pissed her off and she wants me to go beat him up lol. wtf.

There's alpha, then there's slim.

2007-03-03T04:07:00.000-05:00

Fucking bitch balled punks

scrap:
chick asks yacine for light, i tell her shit aint for free she gotta give him a kiss, ignores me, i call her a bitch, ignores me, yacine gives light like a pussy i tell her fuck you.

later on two pussies go back home.

i go for a smoke, same chick comes down with wannabe tough looking gay cepsum addict.
i bad talk her behind back with aboude, she then comes to ask me for a smoke, i tell her shit aint for free, point to my cheek request a kiss, she's sorta like meh, but goes for it.

I then grab my pack, and point to other chick, all this time the guy is walking up near us, trying to see what's happening, she's reluctant and says like "commooon" i tell her "didnt ur mommy teach u any good manners" and point to right cheek, she giggles, understand im not gonna let go easy and knows im a tough guy by now.

She then says some shit about bf being here like "ya but my boyfriends right here he aint gonna like it", i ignore her, shrug, and point, guy gets pissed on his own and says "yo man she asked you for a smoke this aint fucking prostitution"..
then i look at the guy, slowly give her smoke and say "alright... show ur bf a goodtime tonight though he looks like he needs it".. guy gets red angry, pissed on his own, has NO come back, and is like "what did you say", i repeat myself he gets aggressive, but still has nocome backs i repeat myself again, the gf then goes to him acts like shes pulling him back, but the pussy knew he couldnt touch me, so he just asked again "what did you say" and our little back and forth goes on a few times, i repeat myself, then he just moves back and gives in ahhahahhaha.
OWNEd.
then they sit near us at first, hear me talking shit about the guy calling him a pussy and all then they move to the far corner of the smoking area.

OWNED.
OWNED.
OWNED.

i say "so what"

OUT FOR A DRINK

2007-02-19T18:15:00.000-05:00

We went for drinks last saturday, and as usual i have many insignificant, but well interpreted stories to tell about the minute by minute happenings of my travel to the bar, in the bar, out the bar, and wherever else.

Once again, i love myself.

I left my house, half a dozen msn windows open in convo's with random chicks who actually came to me from a fair dating site i posted some photos on and where i wrote a nice intro DHV, i love that they love me, and they love me ! So it's cool for everyone, i'll keep the juicy details for another post though. I was in the midst of taking care of a dozen things at home too with my over exhausted father coming home from approximately 28 hours of work with 1 hour of sleep and of course in this situation i better stfu and do as he says.

Soon thereafter, i find a brief moment for myself to dress up appropriately and slip away through the basement door, in the comfort of -10 temperatures. Believe me when i say that saturday's weather paled in comparison to some of last weeks, especially in my new so fucking warm jacket !

By this time i'm already walking down my street to the bus stop, just to be welcomed by a hot young quebecoise admiring me like a prey his prize! All to whisper to me a couple of words that i do not make sense of immediately, i keep on walking, and i notice that she is still looking at me/staring so i turn around and force a smile as to say whats up, "Welcome to quebec" she says in such an innocent tone.

For a second there i stood hesitating to punish her for a racist comment i expected to come out of her mouth next, only to hear her say how she loves it with the snowflakes, and pretty banquets of snow all over.. then again i smiled, and i left her discoursing alone.

Then again, even if it was a racist remark she made, why, and how would i have punished her? all i really wanted was to force my huge dick and balls up her fresh and clean pussy. But seeing how that would have made her happy i don't count that as punishment, so much as it is a reward.

Anyways, i did not exploit this situation, don't ask me why, if i knew how i would have. I think it's all this speak of exams coming up this week, and my habit of putting my mind in a schizoid state during these supposed times of work.

One loss, i could at least have had a semi entertaining conversation for the 5 minutes during which i waited for my bus.

Big deal, life goes on, right about now i'm waiting for the metro and hearing announcements through the speaker that it's going to be late! "...un incident...". So to spice things up obviously i'm hoping for the worse unfortunately the wait is so long i feel no longer entertained by contemplating exotic accidents. And not even a hot chick to ogle at in sight.. Eventually the metro comes and some cops are searching the first car for evidence of whatever happened.

Finally i make it outside peel to walk down in what seems to be a fairly animated st. catherines! Quite a surprise as it seems i haven't been going out at the right times these days. I didn't feel the same vibe as before.

Of course, two random hot excited, innocent blonde chicks come to me asking if their lips look fine... i fail to play with that. Let me note first that i've read on some forums how a lack of testosterone affects reactions very much, i can say it's quite that. The problem is that i have high testosterone levels, but that i know when i use them in my reactions, .. the reactions are not natural and are only intelligible composites of other reactions i have observed from observation rather than experience. This makes for very aggressive, sometimes incongruent things coming out of my mouth. I should have just kissed them and forget about the rest.

i still have to write about everything else that happened this night, but i guess that can wait.

That time of the year

2007-02-18T15:19:00.000-05:00

Here it a comes, a continuation to what is but a great story of the start, the middle, and.. maybe not this last one: the end of... whatever.

This is to let you know regular posting is going to resume on this blog! i can feel you shaking in your undies. And rightly so.

More of the best, with more juicy details than ever before, and a detailed look at the intricacies of how everything does happen.

Loss of motivation

2006-04-29T21:37:00.000-04:00

After a long period of exams i've once again lost motivation for approach, i however am convinced that any anxiety has been eliminated, and i truly feel like my old self. I feel the flow in most conversations.

It's a matter of social practice now, to autoactualize myself.

I sense that i should soon become the pua giant i am physically.

Correction

2006-04-17T17:46:00.000-04:00

it's not pimp-hat, it's a fedora hat. That's the name.

Breaking out of my shell

2006-03-28T16:56:00.000-05:00

I haven't posted much here for a couple of weeks because i've been busy either going out, posting elsewhere, with school, or many other reasons.

I love this blog because it's a way for me to speak to you from the inside of my shell. Or at least it used to be. Now it's looking much more like a log of Field Reports from nights out picking up women, and it's becoming less fun for me, it really feels like i'm just exchanging one shell for a new one i'm constructing at the same place.

Recently i was given an inner game assignement by a PUG (i wont name here), the assignement consisted of writing lists of personal information (emotions, how i feel them, etc.) and personal stories, basically all self-rediscovery.

Using this assignement, the structure of it, and the introspection i've done over the years, I am now able to formulate a new assignement for myself that looks like the original, but is better targeted for me to not bring me out of this *emotional* shell only, but to bring me back to the desired state i so truly feel natural in and live by inside my shell.

This assignements consists of:

Listing my personal goals,
how will i profit from each.
how much i should comit to it.
how i can motivate myself to achieve it.

I would list 10 goals to start with, decompose each into several elements, and keep track of their progression.

It's an important part of pick up to be balanced, it's an important part of life, congruence is transcending.

TAdadadada dum da dum!

2006-03-04T22:23:00.000-05:00

4 nights was as much as i could pull (low budget) for this reading week.

Here's a short write up of the general things i learned:

First of all, SOCIAL PROOF IS GOLD, now i use social proof very, loosely here, and in a loud club environment, as much as just being the guy who "cheers" everyone in the club, or even barely high fiving dancing chicks can help a lot, it'll give you a mystical sort of aura especially if you don't talk and it'll give you something to do if you get EC and can't think of anything to say.

Hanging out with one wing at all times even if he is quiet, or if you are, helps a lot too. But one mistake i did while going out with a wing was not follow him at all times during the approach, whereas on the last day i had a different person accompagny me he was constantly following me, that increased aura/success.

The basic social dynamic rules (ie. don't approach moving sets, ...) all apply.

I had near-success with a moving chick by NEGging her first *you're kinda cute* but be ready to react sharply to her response/reaction. And maybe ignore her after.

NLP is gold, but sometimes too powerful, and calibration is the key, i suggest to try it all the way to see the result, and then learn to calibrate depending on the reactions. One of my mistakes here is that as i saw it working IMMEDIATELY, i took a few seconds to think of something else NON-NLP to continue the approach, bad move, see where it goes, then go into rapport, and ask questions about the emotional aspects of anything realting to her/her mind/things like that. Then use these in your sentence construction to suggest you believe in those very things, reformulate it.

It's important that you tell your story, and work from a *what concerns you* point of view.

Don't try to hard, don't insist.

Like a charm!

2006-03-02T12:23:00.000-05:00

already 2 nights of non-stop non-sensical Sarging, fucking golden. Just talking to various people and developping my game at better stages, also getting more first hand observations of the Dynamics of club sarges and so on. Very nice.

My basic sticking point is to go for developping my sarges step by step instead of going straight for the gold (and only hoping on occasional success). With the more rigorous approach i am using, i'll be sure to get the skills required to game HBs whenever i like and hence become a Proficient PUA! Also this stuff is not useful for picking up chicks only, but observing the basic social dynamics of people in the greatest social settings!

If you've just passed by this blog i strongly recommend you look into my 10-day to PUA CHALLENGE and take it.

Great stuff.

It really is about being yourself

2006-02-28T01:59:00.000-05:00

Don't try to be congruent with the game, make the game congruent with you.
You just have to find out who you really are, and the best way to know is through women because as a man you'll only see it rationally and logically. Whereas your personality is truly emotional.

Find out what experiences shaped you, and how they shaped your tastes, have a reality-check of your true standards, and don't be indifferent to them. The rest is just being a man, and covering that up ;)

The SLIM 10 day to PUA challenge.

2006-02-22T20:31:00.000-05:00

First of all, let me clarify the only thing you CAN win is self-growth in this challenge.
I hope you knowing you wont be the only one participating will help too!

Aside from coming up with that catchy title, i'd like to challenge any reader of this blog to get into this competition, against your current self, with me.

I aim to go out 6 times in the following 10 days and the challenge is to set yourself a, relative to your past, realistic+1 minimum limit of approaches per night.

Yes realistic+1 that is you take the maximum amount of approaches you see yourself carrying out realistically, do that many, and then do one more. That is the only way anyone can improve in anything.

Let yourself be stopped by nothing, if chicks are alack, venue change.

Here's the dirt on my planning for the evenings ahead:
I will do 3 warm up sets: these do not count, they are only warmups, however far i get in them, i presume i will fail somewhere in them, maybe i'll plant seeds to later develop if i see them again that night...it's only to get me in the social mood and have the inertia to bust through the sets, and it's just a minimum opens i set myself (anyways after 3 so-so sets you ALWAYS get inertia and desire to open more).

With these 3 warm ups i plan to use Canned (c) openers a la david bowie and such, the others after that i'll use anything, including those, and situational.

I'll repost this with more details in due time.

It would be nice if those who take the challenges leave a FR in comments. Might post it on front page.

February...exam month

2006-02-20T11:07:00.000-05:00

Sigh

on the goals of a PUA issue

2006-02-04T15:31:00.000-05:00

It seems some guys had issues with my LR. on the fact that i characterised the girl as a UG, and fat, and therefore there was no real playing involved. Let me just say that if i said the girl was a UG it's not my personal opinion, most of the guys who saw the girl and i was with told me to go ahead before i did. So a majority of guys told me "just do it", otherwise i would not have.

The elements of the LR that are most related to PU i guess would be how i dealt with the LMR i knew that if i followed and was still within reach, yet looked like i would be going home, she would have time to rethink it. The girl actually was ok with me following her and just staying at her place, which was not an option for me, due to othe circumstances.

And i used a more gunwitch like- body language like approach for the kiss/make out.

The dirt on Thursday night-UPDATED

2006-01-29T15:15:00.000-05:00

This is an LR, i was also drunk.

+
initially started talking to her when she asked for a light to a friend, then busted him on his RIVAL univeristy shirt, my friend was defending himself pretty good, i was just indifferent. Then i came back to her and i asked her to take the rival university sweatshirt off cause it made her look dumb. She then commented on how people from there do go farther, etc. BAsic child bs. then i just did KINO and got closer to her and tried a Style evolution shift, but i was drunk and failed so i just went in with gut-feeling and me-drunk natural routine to land a kiss and make out.
She came back for more as i went outside for a smoke
-
The interesting part is mostly how i fended off some LMR, which came in the form of "i can't do this", etc. as we were walking back, to which i asked why and got lame responses like "i don't even know your name" etc. anyways i think that added to the excitement.
+
to the name thing i answered "Funny how you'll be screaming it later," to add some suspense before i give her my name, i also enquired about hers first.
-
+
i wanted to add something in the likes of "you'll be the one getting the hot-man candy" but due to lack of confidence, and maybe memory more so i just gave her true qualifiers on me due to my height. Which i shouldnt exploit too much.
-

Then i was frankly tired and said i'd just wait for my bus and go home. She waited a second, a cab passed she just pulled me in it! i guess my indiference must have been proof to her of my non-neediness, who knows.

After that i used some line like "You'll be the one showing off anyways, i got nothing" sort of hard on her, but seeing she's trying to fend me off i find it fair.

Then at the last moment she refused claiming she had no condoms to which i just said "ok," and continued make out! I was getting more and more emotional with the makeout and i'm sure her feeling my throbbing cock up sliding on her leg must have turned her on too, so finally she looked again and found some condoms heh.

I gotta get some better pussy next time, this shit stank.

Pimp hat + attention

2006-01-16T13:41:00.000-05:00

I got myself an al capone hat in NYC over new years.
I've worn it a couple times already, it's fucking great for peacocking heh!
Especially with the whole long vest, scarf, etc.

Some interesting topics of discussion

2006-01-15T12:07:00.000-05:00

Ring fingers:
http://members.aol.com/katydidit/fingers.htm

Birthstones:

palm reading, body language, handwriting analysis, you doing it on her.

Of course you need to escalate at some point afterwards, i think waiting for some bait/her giving you a compliment, and then instead of thanking her mirror the compliment making it about how cute she is and say that it doesn't matter to you, and that even though people might judge others on physical traits, what's really important in the long run is the personality, and then ask her 3 things that would make you want to know her better.

Fruitless night

2006-01-15T12:05:00.000-05:00

I think being well rested is essential to having the motivation to go out and pick up chicks. Or at least for me while i begin to learn these things. Confidence then just comes along naturally

Fruitful night out v2.

2006-01-07T12:51:00.000-05:00

I don't know if i mentioned this, but here it is:
The chicks had given us their hotel room#s and addresses, they told us to come later that night, Had we not screwed up this would have been a clean ONS, like i say later though they opened us so this was a great opportunity to test post-opener material, no limit (ie. chicks opening you is a major IOI, even though you still have to prove your wits.)

It happens often enough to me in montreal/a lot of places, i guess it must be because of my height, and the way i dress (big) that gives an alpha first impression+ my friends who are also tall+ somewhat big or at least classy. (in montreal i think everyone gets opened often it's the fucking city of sex, believe me or not.)

--------
We didn't exactly plan to go out for that purpose last night, but we ended up doing it anyway.

We went downtown to a nice pub when chicks (4 of them from 3 to 6) opened us, aside from being McDonalds (c) sized they looked (3 of them) alright cute, and had otherwise good proportions and heavy breasts.

Mistakes:
we acted too needy and stayed with them the whole time without doing "comfort building". If we were going to stick around to them as much, we should have noticed that they were in the bag pretty much the instant we started talking to them and started with more rapport building from about 5 min in.
Also should not apply too much cocky and funny when they are this interested this soon, still tease and play around but no cocky funny. (to get another kiss i said "Common you can do better?" she however took it wrong, i don't know if it's the way i said it... she said "What i'm a bad kisser?" that fucked it up. Might have been a shittest too who knows.

Good things:
It was a chance to refine my post opener discussions/games here's what i used:
Bestfriend test
Lie game
Thumb war+loser has to kiss winner.

I used this last one by telling the one with my friend they had to play thumb war, i did this then with another couple and they did it. Friends won, so i said the loser had to kiss the winner, and bingo it was no surprise.

One thing i did with the lie game was i acted maybe too stressed and let them tell me their truths/lies each one after the other i should have taken care one of them at the time busting their balls too, because the way i did it they alltold me their truths/lies and i couldn't remember what they said by the end !!! (drunkenness)

Otherwise after this point we should have ejected gone to have a drink/watch other chicks dance. OR we should have brought them somewhere quieter in the club to establish good rapport, but really good rapport and comfort building, constructing a good image for ourselves.

I've said earlier this blog isnt for would'ves/could'ves but these are just educational, and based on experimented stuff anyways.

Shit night out 2

2005-12-21T02:50:00.000-05:00

For me at least, but i'll recover once i've recovered from my cold :P

anyways 2 opens
one really bad reject, the chick was apparently in a serious relationship. so no hard feelings.
2nd open went well, but was sick and so was brain so my material quickly ran dry and she was leached by passer-by.

Bad night out

2005-12-18T01:57:00.000-05:00

No opens, no nothing.
I was sick from the begining to the end, a lot of open doors i didn't peak through.

I think the problem was partially my cold, and my need to work a bit on anchoring. I gotta get doc. on that.

On closing

2005-12-17T19:42:00.000-05:00

I'm not going to attempt #closes until i get one #close asked by the girl.
Reason: i need to develop my discussion skills enough to the point of catching the girl's interest all the while seeming a bit intriguing so that she wants to know more about me. I can see how to work that all, and i must develop it.

Until then i'll just work on my opening/development parts of my approaches.

More stats and tech.

2005-12-16T02:55:00.000-05:00

Gogo lounge+Tokyo bar:

8 successful opens of sets between 2-6 girls+ 2 rejects(that could easily have been gamed/ended up differently with a different approach) @ gogo.

at tokyo, 5 good vibes in chick, but the chicks were pretty immature and mostly rejected, even though we got a good 5 min of chat post *rejection* attempt, and constant huge smiles/laughs. (i guess they must not get these types of Mr. Smooth approaches often and have thought of us as weirdoes)

And some perv. chick pinching everyone's ass towards the end, i came to her to collect my fees but she wanted to play authority figure....retrospect: shoulda kissed her when she was standing up to me.

@ tokyo&gogo towards the end the chicks were coming to us/checking us out, having seen our gaming all around, and the guys were all thinking we were some sort of high valued guys.
I fucking love this lifestyle.

we also befriended the gogo staff, and OWNED the line up @ gogo, when we had to come back in to get our jackets, the chicks were like who the fuck are they. Fucking 5 star social proof. Amazing shit.

Chicks ranked from 6-8.5/9:
Really good vibe from the 9 too! at one point she commented on how she was amazed by my height, i could have gamed her slightly differently and secluded her from her friends/guy friend (dunno if it was boyfriend, but i still stood a chance).

Should'ves/could'ves arent for this blog ;) so it was a SUCCESS.

I tried to #close a chick, but although interested she felt we didnt talk enough, and let me know. I gotta work on random emotional discussion, and keeping it interesting/sexual.
About that girl, i had started her friend, and then she had joined into the discussion at the very begining, she was average cute, i had tried some sort of bestfriend test, and she answered with a "we're not making out!" hahahha, i hadn't laughed because i thought she was talking about her and me! but obviously she meant her and her friend, great ioi i guess, trying to crack a joke. She also kept an eye on me the whole night, same with most girls @ the bar. I had my *You can't play the player* t-shirt too so it might have been obvious what reasons i was out there for. Tons of fun! But the chicks loved me too! so i'm tons happy.

Those who rejected me @ gogo, i think i didn't project an alpha male attitude strongly enough, hesitating, just being quiet,
So they gave me a shittest/reject (which could have been gamed) saying "We were having a discussion here, what are you doing talking about "

I then said i just needed their opinion but that was weak. What i should have said is "Because what i'm talking about is infinetly more interesting than anything you two could be talking about!"
but hey: scars only make your skin tougher! so i just moved along and gamed every chick, (with friends help) .

Got rejected by a set of 2 blond 7s who thought themselves heigher, but were not worth it.

Great MR SMOOTH approaches @ tokyo i felt fucking natural doing the MR. SMOOTH, and the chicks Loved it, chick tried to reject me/buddy with *i'm not interested* i owned her with a *neither am i* but i ended with a *we're just here to have fun* B-A-D.

Resume:
Keep gaming, trying different openers, try some more Natural feeling Mr. smooth too.

Goals:
next outing # close/kiss close.

Future outings (soon)
F* close in bathroom.

A lot of the chicks showed excellent reception/etc. about my height too. i gotta find some one liners for that.

Side note 2

2005-12-12T11:51:00.000-05:00

Things have never been better.
I'm not back yet, but here's the status quo:
Ever since a large open in a night club, and a contact-close with a quite cute target before that, i'm opening everywhere, thinking ON the instant/moment and i feel much more conscious of the environment and things close to/around me. Less intimidated too.

Exams are still a pain, but they're almost over.

The real revelation will be once the exams are over and i get some basic material to use and completly take care of my lack of confidence. Then i can go straight with my own material on the moment.

Good bye, and thanks for all the fish.

2005-12-08T11:36:00.000-05:00

I think it's time i gave it a break, and i try the material.

What's important is going out and talking to chicks first. The rest (this blog) is just details, that in my case aren't verified but only based on theory.

Yes i will be back, once i have new tested material to write about. There is some biographical material lower in this blog, that would go under that category, but the material is not scripted, and most details my failures rather than successes.

I hope to change that the next time i post here.

PS: i also have exams this month so heh :-P might be an added reason

Cocky & funny Naturally!

2005-12-01T19:50:00.000-05:00

Here are s ome points of note on being cocky and funny:
As i've said before, the way we act ourselves with those close to us, is a good model to base your cocky and funny style on.

Even those of us that are nice guys with their close ones!

I'm sure anyone can think of a moment of frustration when they at least thought of cocky and funny things to say, but never got to say them...They perceived it completly in their conscience (in that inner voice blabbering all day) but never got it out.

In situations where you might be intimidated or in awe because of a girl, your conscience might even shut up and focus on HER, and on trying to make YOU perfect, thinking extremly fast of all the dumb things you can prevent yourself from doing. And the more you think the less you talk, and the more you get frustrated. It's an evil circle. It all started cause you thunk.

The goal is clearly to NOT overthink situations you might say, and i will concure. Too much thinking just leads to deadly silence.

But then what to do? Well occupy your mind thinking of something ELSE way more constructive in the current situation, what is that you might ask?

Well right now think of one situation with some person (preferably girl), whoever it might be, with whome you constantly came up with quick c&f answers to any questions or problems they might pose.

Think of that person and GENERALISE that person to absolutly every girl. More than that, try to think of how you felt the last time you were with that person, how things were going in your brain (usually very calm, unstressful, just happy and carefree) . Focus on that mode of thinking, focus on it a while. Enough so that you can feel it.

Now what you need to do is go on with doing what you were doing and check back every five minutes as to whether or not you're in that mood again. If not, focus on it, try that for a half hour, then hour, then longer and longer.

Once you get to feel like that for a reasonable period of time (i'll let you be the judge of what reasonable is, i remind you that you need to be in that mood when you approach girls so however long you think it takes you to close a set or what not), you can go back to doing whatever and being in whatever mood. But keep on trying to instore that mood instantly at random times of the day. That will eventually permit you to just click your fingers and get in that mood so that you can do that when you need to be in that state.

It really does work, the mind a powerful machine, your thoughts are steering it.

News

2005-11-30T18:20:00.000-05:00

The blog has been idol for a couple of days, i'm waiting for news from the local seduction lair so that i can join and meet guys interested in seduction for discussions and to get me new inspiration for this blog.

I hesitated to post manipulation posts on this blog because once again i'm not sure how well this really relates to the initial part of seduction i'm more interested in, nor in the practice of it at all... but i guess it works in other parts of life so here it is i'll post it again (below)

Manipulation

2005-11-30T17:29:00.000-05:00

Here are some techniques to manipulate people. If you're an analysing kind of guy you'd like to see how C&f fits in here.

Conditioning by association:
ie. How many fingers does one man have on his hands? how many on ten hands?

Give them an example of something simple that is perfectly logical, and then you can hint them to a generalization of that simple thing that may actually be more complex, and possibly not true. It's all actually a lot like a play on words. On top you might have answered 10, 100. Re-read the question and think about it if you did. (You still can be manipulated if you didn't say that :P)

Reciprocity:
This is a big one which is used in several techniques describes inside this blog.
If someone does you a favour, however small once an attachement is created, you will feel you have to pay them back.

ie. Someone proposes you nicely a sample for free, you will feel like you should by the box.

This is something you learn early on: Always return favors or you will be disliked. Of course it's easier to refuse simpler favors bud depending on the WAY it is exposed to us, we will be more or less tempted to accept/pay em back.
Other examples:
"Let me help you with your bag..."
"I dedicated my life to you..."

People respond to conditioning. Just know what social habits are learned early on, you can play with them.

Seduction note:
A good use for the second technique is for example when you get unacceptable social behavior from a chick. One thing you can do, is be absurdly obvious and let her know that Your mother taught you as a child NOT to behave like that, ie. instant rejection from the chick, you can say as part of your social ettiquette, your mom taught you to answer when asked a question nicely. They will have such an emotional surge of REMORSE, that they will be begging for your attention back. Said in a Natural way, it ALWAYS works.
Break;

Another technique, to get her attention for example, is to ask a totally irrelevant non-seduction related question. But then of course to make the jump to seduction talk you must have material ready, getting her attention though is already pretty big. This is just a dismantling of perfectly normal/well known social skills/habits.
ie. Hey, short pause, You have the time?
Hey, short pause, You have a cigarette?

the pause gives her a bit more time to feel attachement especially if done with eye contact, she will feel a sort of stress level going up as you ask.

Alright so those are the "Automatic" manipulation techniques.
More soon.

Other aspect of manipulation in seduction.

2005-11-30T16:50:00.000-05:00

Teasing is the most manipulative technique. Just giving her a taste of what is to come gets her hormones rushing like cray-zee, to the point where she just rapes you.

A good exemple is maybe when kissing her, don't do it immediately, just act like you're about too, look her in the eyes/lips, approach her, then move a bit last minute and start breathing on her neck. Doing that a few times will make her just jump on your lips and not letting go.

Remember that nature is so that 1 male can mate with many females continuously, where as 1 female has a 1 guy for 9 months, so she's desperate to find the right one and keep him. You're the man, you make the decisions and rules. Making a girl aware of your presence, will make her want you, as long as she feels safe wiht you. If she gets a good feeling around you, she wants to keep you to herself.

On this whole manipulation thing, i'm not going to support harrassing women, "USING" them, abusing them etc., i find it stupid, but we're all human and those women concerned are conditioned to play a game with you, therefore you must know how to handle your deck, and turn the game around to your advantage.

Manipulation - a bit more on the seduction aspect.

2005-11-30T16:40:00.000-05:00

The cocky and funny is actually throwing the girl completly off, why? because she expects you to play by her rules of logic, as society has taught us to do. Giving a cocky answer in a funny way, mean you give her an answer that does apply, is innovative, and anyways she isn't expecting. The funny part makes the answer acceptable because she will be laughing.

She will understand that you live your life by your rules and will want to adapt to your rules, because you're being funny at the same time as you are cocky. You are doing her a favor by actually talking to her, she wants to pay you back. The cockyness you apply should make her understand that her opinion is irrelevant to YOU. You are God in your own world, she wants access to it, she's gotta try you harder, you're giving her a sample, she's working her way up.

Realistic approach tactics

2005-11-20T11:55:00.000-05:00

Sometimes you get the feeling you should just go ahead and talk to an attractive lady. You can really feel the chemistry, and you know that however the conversation goes, you will be comfortable in carrying it. However you do have trouble finding the "opener", and are still an AFC frustrated by paranoia of being rejected.

Personally i believe it's all about the certain state of mind you're in and the surrounding environment. And unfortunately following the method i will recommend in case both of those are actually good, a lot will depend on the reaction of the girl (my personal view is that a simple classical method, not dealing excessively with c&f is better to start a relationship the SLOW way). C&f nearly predetermines the answer you will get, since you know the effect is to sorta confuse her.

I think if you reallly feel it, you should just go for it and talk to her about the most random things. If she responds good the odds are she's interested too. Key things to keep in mind, even though this is a slow way to start the relationship, you might want to keep your discussion with her short, and get her email before you show her with body-language (looking ahead) that you've gotta go.

To practice this just go talk randomly to people (male/female) this will sort of calm down your fear of talking to random strangers. Also looking like an open talkative person helps. I don't know why but i often get random people coming to talk to me (i go out at night a couple times a week, at least once or twice people make random remarks to start short discussions.)

Sample C&F scenarios

2005-11-13T17:07:00.000-05:00

Here are a few cocky and funny approaches, you can try them but the responses from chix WILL VARY, that's not a probability but predeterminate. So here it is.

Y= you.
H= hot babe.

-- night club scenario (try one where the music is not TOO loud)
y: You just got lucky you win a free dance.
--
h: ugh, no thanx i'm with my friends,
y: Is this you guys' first date(if she's with her girlfriends)?
h: ugh.. or smile, and negation or jokingly positive, or even better honestly positive answer.
--
h: ugh, not interested.
y: Neither am i, i'm here to party and your personal interest are not important to me.
--

y: you look like you're having trouble getting some men anyways! i got some fine piece of meat right over there (point to random guy who you will need to quickly BEFRIEND or to your wingman). And i can read the desire in your eyes,<>

After 1-2 free dance, so that you don't go blank on her say this:

y: Ok so there goes your free dance, my rate's 20$ from now, or you just buy me a drink.

And if by then she probably will go logical on you (ie. asking your name etc.). Just give her Cocky answers: "i'm superman...", " Tarzan looking for my jane", "The version of indianna johnes!", and for age "99 years old,", "Old enough,<3>, to know not to answer a question like that".

Improving the odds.

2005-11-12T17:02:00.000-05:00

*ATTENTION: i do not say here that it matters much what you look like. Because frankly if you're a damn good seductor you could look like a piece of shit on legs with arms and still attract chicks. It is however interesting to know the following*

We've all heard the *I don't care how he looks, what is essential is his personality* bull shit. And although that is true, very much so in seduction, and it is in fact what most seduction techniques are based on, look does improve your initial odds.

What is look? well if you read my past articles on what kind of guy looks good, etc. you'll get a hint, here i'll talk about how to improve on your look, i'll start off with the obvious, and start talking of a few exercises that can help you look better with Facial exercises. A sort of Facelift through exercises.

Exercising is good for your health in moderation, and it makes you look healthy. When you look healthy you look attractive.

Exercising also makes you look taller when you do it correctly with that in mind. A class mate of mine which was an avid exercise buff ended up growing (from what i've been told and noticed) about 15 centimeters in less than 2.5 years, he was about 17 years old when he started and is still growing, but from what i've heard he was scrawny short kid before i came, now he's about 6'2 and extremely lean muscular like last time i saw him. He signed up to a standard workout program at the YMCA and started playing around and figuring it out by himself.

Of course this example is idealistic and most people want results immediately. I can tell you when i started working out; i received positive feedback and comments on muscular growth and cut (even if subtle) after no longer than 3 months. I however was discouraged and gave up by 6 month, it all left hereafter. That was a bad move.

Another Dramatic change i noticed was in a young man who was excessively athletic, younger he had big round cheeks but as he started out running and playing soccer, and such sports he lost his cheeks had a wonderful cut face, muscular not scrawny-bony like. That's another success story, he however did not "workout" and remained pretty slim.

So to sum up: I think running probably does wonders in weight loss, training does the same in muscle gain. A combination of both does for a complete re-shape of your body. Try it. Organize yourself and do not give up.

Finally i'd like to talk about facial muscle, having the "cute" smile and dominant over-look. Although you do inherit your eyes, and maybe frown marks on your forehead, the jaw, the mobile part of your face is in your complete control.

If we look at bradd pitt, george clooney, Ashton Kutcher. Bref, all those good looking guys, they have a very muscular jaw and smile. There's of course the heart i talk about in the other article and a lean, clean look.

I'm going to recommend you check this out although you do what you want concerning the purchase of this item, i will say that the concept is quite ingenious, you can muscle your face up using this tool, helping your muscles to pull your face lean, cut the fat and make you look sharp!

Other exercises, that i recommend, that are purely unscientific but may help:

Smile often, a lot, even if your alone at home just to stretch your face out a bit, exercise those muscles
chew your meat 30 times
chew gum!
eat apples?! in most movies i recall with brad pitt he's eating an apple...go figure that one out but heh, why not give it a try. Fruits are healthy anyways.
Put your thumbs at the back of your molars and try to close your mouth from all directions, pulling towards the outside with your thumbs (like you're trying to split your cheeks apart)
Run a lot. That does make you loose fat everywhere.

On attraction, to seduction.

2005-11-06T13:46:00.000-05:00

As an avid consumer of seduction websites and products for the past several months, one thing i can say is that most of the things i was supposed to learn from those I already knew or was applying but with the wrong people!

Concerning the behavior to have in a seduction scenario, the pimp attitude, what to say, or more generally, who to be and how to do it. One of the best ways to sum up the methods and the content learned after months of self mentoring is to quote my personal selection of best tips.

Cited then explained:

(I) Be yourself, as in be who you are at home with everyone.

Don't force yourself to have a certain attitude decided by the surrounding crowd: you always keep the same face, body, physical identity that goes so well with that personality you've developped all yourlife in your household.
Be that same "rebel" person you are with your mom, siblings, and all your family, or should have been when you reached a certain stage of puberty even OUTSIDE of the household.
The previous applies to the attitude you'd have with a wife, etc. visualize!
If you're not mature enough within your household, with your family, then you will have troubles outside of that household and will need to make an extra effort of ACTING as another personality. That is not fresh.

(II) Genetics: A woman wants a MAN.

Masculinity is what turns girls on, in prehistoric times a woman needed a man to provide food, a shelter, and protection for her and her kids because she could not do that while taking care of her kids, this is all genetically programmed. Just like men want a beautiful, healthy women to carry his genes down a generation, we can't help it. The only difference nowadays is we have a mind, but i'm speaking purely genetically.
A man CAN mate with several women in a short period of time; it's therefore unmanly to be needy, choosers are not beggars. Although persistance does show you will make an effort to get to her, getting on your knees can make you seem weak, it could make you sweet in times when that's what she's looking for, but she always has her friends for that too. It's all about the timing, so to start with her just be overly cheeky.

(III) The 3 seconds rule:

http://fastseduction.com/guide/01_The_Basic_Rules/3seconds.shtml
It's not enough to understand it, it must be applied in every communication; if a conversation is not instantaneously (within 3 seconds) struck with the target, then you're not going to do anything anyways, and don't consider it as a failure: nothing happened, so it was more like inactivity. Humans must however move, as long as they're alive.

Some NEG-hits of note

2005-11-06T01:50:00.000-05:00

Here's a list of NEG hits i've noted from several sites or come up with. Have some other ones? please post them in comments, also if you've tried some comment too.

One thing i noticed after reading a long list of them and just walking around looking at chicks is that it's much more spontaneous to come up with negs.

Chicks also talk a lot, and they are emotional in their speech, so sometimes logic evades them and you can play on what they might say that is ILLOGICAL because of that, turning it into a subtle dis. She'll try to explain it in a different way, just act like you don't care/understand, she will persist until she feels understood.

those are beautiful glasses, you get all your goggles at home depot?
this your first date? (ex. Use on two girls sitting @ having a drink)
nice shoes, what are you 4 feet tall usually?(high heels)
I didn't know rolex made plastic watches
that's nice, buy that new?
Excu... did you just grab my asS?
I could marry a woman like you. Yah, i'd divorce a week later and take half of your money
can't you come up with something more original to say
Stop it already, would you just go buy me a drink
you just ruined everything, i used to be a little bit attracted to you but you still got a lotta work to do (chick complaining about one of her superficial *flaws*)

I think i got the following from thundercat's lair:
1.
Jason: Are those nails real?
HB9: No
Jason: Oh. Well at least they look nice.

2.
Jason: You're pretty dark is that tan real?
HB9: No I went tanning.
Jason: Oh. Well at least it looks real.

3.
HB9: Do you like my new haircut?
Jason: Yeah I like it little messy on top. (If it's straight)

4.
HB9: Do you like my new haircut?
Jason: Yeah I like the left site. (If her hair is different no each side)

5.
HB9: Hey let's go get some ice cream!
Jason: Hell yeah let's do it. I like a girl who's not afraid to gain some pounds.

6.
Jason: Cool shoes. My mom has a pair just like that.

7.
Jason: Mm that perfume smells good. I think my mom has that same one.

8.
HB9: Do you like my new purse?
Jason: Yeah that one's really popular. A lot of girls at my school have that one.

9.
Jason: Hey there is this girl in my class who has that same shirt!

10.
HB9: Hey check out my new watch.
Jason: Oh yeah I really like that one. My cousin has the same one!

11.
Jason: What did ya buy?
HB9: I bought a new shirt.
Jason: Cool lemme see it.
HB9: Here.
Jason: Oh nice. My moms got one just like it.

12.
Jason: That's really cute how your nose wiggles when you talk.

13.
Jason: Is that your real hair color?
HB9: No it's dyed.
Jason: Oh. Well at least it looks good.

14.
Jason: I like your make-up job.

15.
Jason: I like the color of your eyes.
HB9: Hehe thanks. They're contacts.
Jason: Oh. Well they look nice.

16:
Jason: Hey cool cell phone. This girl in my class has the same one.

17:
HB9: Do you think I'm fat?
Jason: No but I like it when I can pinch a little here. (And then pinch her stomach)

18:
Jason: Hey weren't you wearing the same outfit the other day?

19:
Jason: You have something in your teeth.

20:
Jason: Hey nice outfit! I like that better than the one you wore last time.

21:
Jason: How old are you?
HB9: I'm __
Jason: Oh. You look older.

22.
Jason: Nice jeans.
HB9: Thanks
Jason: They make your ass look small. (I would suggest this only after a few dates!)
HB9: Oh.. Thanks.

23.
Jason: Nice breasts are they real?
HB9: No
Jason: Oh.. At least they look real. (At the strip club)

24.
Jason: You have big feet for a girl but those shoes look good on you.
HB9: Oh... Thanks.

25.
Jason: Hey I like this CD.
HB9: Oh thanks.
Jason: Yeah my grandma has this same one.

Beautiful lady!

2005-11-05T12:00:00.000-05:00

For males, my friend claimed a *large jaw* was attractive as it was a reflection of dominance. I disagreed, i didn't have much palpable proof on hand except logic so i tried to argue against him, i however was convinced that chin size was irrelevant (thinking of other male models than brad pitt who actually were highly ranked).

I know have a bit more proof from the article, what i told him that day was that a fair-skin was important, and i agreed on his argument of symmetry, but the large jaw was probably just a way to expose the fair skin if that is the case, however if the skin is not fair, we may not come to the same conclusion.

"Females, however, have a preference for males who look more mature -- generally heart-shaped, small-chinned faces with full lips and fair skin. But during menstruation, females prefer a soft-featured male to a masculine one. Indeed, researchers found that female perceptions of beauty actually change throughout the month."

Also concerning the jaw:
"When viewing profiles, both males and females prefer a face in which the forehead and jaw are in vertical alignment. Altogether, the preference for youthful and even infant-like, features, especially by menstruating women, suggest people with these features have more long-term potential as mates as well as an increased level of reproductive fitness."

As for the WHR i mentioned (cited my professor actually) apparently that is only a byproduct of western culture:
"Psychologists at Newcastle University in England have shown that an indigenous people located in southeast Peru, who have had little contact with the Western world, actually have a preference for high WHRs. These psychologists assert that a general preference for low WHRs is a byproduct of Western culture."

Other interesting quotes:

"In society, attractive people tend to be more intelligent, better adjusted, and more popular. This is described as the halo effect - due to the perfection associated with angels. Research shows attractive people also have more occupational success and more dating experience than their unattractive counterparts. One theory behind this halo effect is that it is accurate -- attractive people are indeed more successful."

"Aronson suggests, based on the self-fulfilling prophecy that people who feel they are attractive - though not necessarily rated as such - are just as successful as their counterparts who are judged to be good-looking."

I'd just like to say about the first quote the part of it that claims attractive people have more dating success, that's not quite true, i would reform that sentence to make it say people with more dating experience, usually look more attractive. It's generally true that when we see a dominant male on television portrayed as a sort of pimp with harem of women following him along we end up considering him as a standard for attractiveness. Now if that enters into the criterion of beauty, i doubt so. But like the article claims attraction is not only beauty and personality (which itself does have social determinants) is important too.

Also i find sometimes that subtle assymetry, such as Britanny Murphy has (i notice it especially in her role in sin city), can only add to charm. (Makes me wanna fuck her wits outta her).

On beauty

2005-11-05T11:47:00.000-05:00

This follows from a discussion i had with a friend. I can only find qualifications of beauty for women, and that makes much sense, for some reason we ended up talking about the possibility of qualifying *beauty* in men, and how to do that when you're a heterosexual man yourself. Frankly i can say had several events not taken place the question of how *beautiful* another man is would never come to my mind, except if i were to compliment him.

"Looking Good: The Psychology and Biology of Beauty

Charles Feng
Human Biology, Stanford University
feng@jyi.org

In ancient Greece, Helen of Troy, the instigator of the Trojan War, was the paragon of beauty, exuding a physical

Model Cindy Crawford, an example of symmetry
Image courtesy of www.cindy.com

brilliance that would put Cindy Crawford to shame. Indeed, she was the toast of Athens, celebrated not for her kindness or her intellect, but for her physical perfection. But why did the Greek men find Helen, and other beautiful women, so intoxicating?

In an attempt to answer this question, the philosophers of the day devoted a great deal of time to this conundrum. Plato wrote of so-called "golden proportions," in which, amongst other things, the width of an ideal face would be two-thirds its length, while a nose would be no longer than the distance between the eyes. Plato's golden proportions, however, haven't quite held up to the rigors of modern psychological and biological research -- though there is credence in the ancient Greeks' attempts to determine a fundamental symmetry that humans find attractive.

Symmetry is attractive to the human eye

Today, this symmetry has been scientifically proven to be inherently attractive to the human eye. It has been defined not with proportions, but rather with similarity between the left and right sides of the face Thus, the Greeks were only partially correct.

By applying the stringent conditions of the scientific method, researchers now believe symmetry is the answer the Greeks were looking for.

By applying the stringent conditions of the scientific method, researchers now believe symmetry is the answer the Greeks
were looking for.

Babies spend more time staring at pictures of symmetric individuals than they do at photos of asymmetric ones. Moreover, when several faces are averaged to create a composite -- thus covering up the asymmetries that any one individual may have -- a panel of judges deemed the composite more attractive than the individual pictures.

Victor Johnston of New Mexico State University, for example, utilizes a program called FacePrints, which shows viewers facial images of variable attractiveness. The viewers then rate the pictures on a beauty scale from one to nine. In what is akin to digital Darwinism, the pictures with the best ratings are merged together, while the less attractive photos are weeded out. Each trial ends when a viewer deems the composite a 10. All the perfect 10s are super-symmetric.

Scientists say that the preference for symmetry is a highly evolved trait seen in many different animals. Female swallows, for example, prefer males with longer and more symmetric tails, while female zebra finches mate with males with symmetrically colored leg bands.

Female zebra finches prefer males with symmetric colorings.
Image courtesy of www.finchworld.com/zebra.html

The rationale behind symmetry preference in both humans and animals is that symmetric individuals have a higher mate-value; scientists believe that this symmetry is equated with a strong immune system. Thus, beauty is indicative of more robust genes, improving the likelihood that an individual's offspring will survive. This evolutionary theory is supported by research showing that standards of attractiveness are similar across cultures.

According to a University of Louisville study, when shown pictures of different individuals, Asians, Latinos, and whites from 13 different countries all had the same general preferences when rating others as attractive -- that is those that are the most symmetric.

Beauty beyond symmetry

However, John Manning of the University of Liverpool in England cautions against over-generalization, especially by Western scientists. "Darwin thought that there were few universals of physical beauty because there was much variance in appearance and preference across human groups," Manning explained in email interview. For example, Chinese men used to prefer women with small feet. In Shakespearean England, ankles were the rage. In some African tribal cultures, men like women who insert large discs in their lips.

Indeed, "we need more cross-cultural studies to show that what is true in Westernized societies is also true in traditional groups," Manning said his 1999 article.

Aside from symmetry, males in Western cultures generally prefer females with a small jaw, a small nose, large eyes, and defined cheekbones - features often described as "baby faced", that resemble an infant's. Females, however, have a preference for males who look more mature -- generally heart-shaped, small-chinned faces with full lips and fair skin. But during menstruation, females prefer a soft-featured male to a masculine one. Indeed, researchers found that female perceptions of beauty actually change throughout the month.

Sizing up the wasit-to-hip ratio: In general, men prefer women with a low WHR.
Image courtesy of health.discovery.com

When viewing profiles, both males and females prefer a face in which the forehead and jaw are in vertical alignment. Altogether, the preference for youthful and even infant-like, features, especially by menstruating women, suggest people with these features have more long-term potential as mates as well as an increased level of reproductive fitness.

Scientists have also found that the body's proportions play an important role in perceptions of beauty as well. In general, men have a preference for women with low waist-to-hip ratios (WHRs), that is, more adipose is deposited on the hips and buttocks than on the waist. Research shows that women with high WHRs (whose bodies are more tube-shaped) are more likely to suffer from health maladies, including infertility and diabetes. However, as is often the case, there are exceptions to the rule.

Psychologists at Newcastle University in England have shown that an indigenous people located in southeast Peru, who have had little contact with the Western world, actually have a preference for high WHRs. These psychologists assert that a general preference for low WHRs is a byproduct of Western culture.

Beauty and choosing a mate

Psychological research suggests that people generally choose mates with a similar level of attractiveness. The evolutionary theory is that by mating with someone who has similar genes, one's own genes are conserved. Moreover, a person's demeanor and personality also influences how others perceive his or her beauty.

Psychological research suggests that people generally choose mates with a similar level of attractiveness.

In one study, 70% of college students deemed an instructor physically attractive when he acted in a friendly manner, while only 30% found him attractive when he was cold and distant. Indeed, when surveyed for attributes in selecting a mate, both males and females felt kindness and an exciting personality were more important in a mate than good looks. Thus, to a certain degree, beauty truly is in the eye of the beholder.

Douglas Yu of the University of East Anglia in Norwich, England, agrees. "It's true by definition. Beauty is always judged by the receiver," he says. At the same time, he says in an email "there is inter-observer concordance, a measure of objectivity," so that individual perceptions of beauty, factoring in other characteristics such as personality and intelligence, can often be aggregated to form a consensus opinion. One of the offshoots of Yu's work in ethnobiology was a piece in Nature in 1998 that showed that the hourglass-body standard of beauty in women, previously thought to be `universally' preferred, was in fact likely swayed by advertising.

The halo effect

In society, attractive people tend to be more intelligent, better adjusted, and more popular. This is described as the halo effect - due to the perfection associated with angels. Research shows attractive people also have more occupational success and more dating experience than their unattractive counterparts. One theory behind this halo effect is that it is accurate -- attractive people are indeed more successful.

Research shows attractive people also have more occupational success and more dating experience than their unattractive counterparts.

An alternative explanation for attractive people achieving more in life is that we automatically categorize others before having an opportunity to evaluate their personalities, based on cultural stereotypes which say attractive people must be intrinsically good, and ugly people must be inherently bad. But Elliot Aronson, a social psychologist at Stanford University, believes self-fulfilling prophecies - in which a person't confident self-perception, further perpetuated by healthy feedback from others - may play a role in success as well. Aronson suggests, based on the self-fulfilling prophecy that people who feel they are attractive - though not necessarily rated as such - are just as successful as their counterparts who are judged to be good-looking.

Whatever the reason, the notion that attractiveness correlates with success still rings true. Yet beauty is not always advantageous, for beautiful people, particularly attractive women, tend to be perceived as more materialistic, snobbish, and vain.

For better or worse, the bottom line is that research shows beauty matters; it pervades society and affects how we choose loved ones. Thus, striving to appear attractive may not be such a vain endeavor after all. This isn't to say plastic surgery is necessarily the answer. Instead, lead a healthy lifestyle that will in turn make you a happier person.

Suggested Reading

Aronson, Elliot. 1999. The Social Animal. New York: Worth Publishers, Inc.

Cowley, Geoffrey. The biology of beauty. Newsweek. 1996 (127): 60-67.

Dion, Karen. 2002. Cultural perspectives on facial attractiveness. Facial Attractiveness: Evolutionary, Cognitive, and Social Perspectives. Eds. Rhodes, Gillian, Zebrowitz, Leslie. Westport, CT: Ablex Publishing.

Hill, C.T. et al. Breakups before marriage: the end of 103 affairs. Journal of Social Issues. 1976 (32): 147-168.

Langlois, J.H. et al. Maxims or myths of beauty? A meta-analytic and theoretical review. Psychological Bulletin. 2000 (126): 390-423.

Little, A and D. Perrett. Putting beauty back in the eye of the beholder. Psychologist. 2002 (15): 28-32.

Manning, JT, RL Trivers, D Singh, R Thornhill. The mystery of female beauty. Nature. 1999 (399): 214-215.

Moller, A.P. and R. Thornhill. Bilateral symmetry and sexual selection: a meta-analysis. American Naturalist. 1998(151): 174-192.

Perrett, David et al. Symmetry and human facial attractiveness. Evolution & Human Behavior. 1999 (20): 295-307.

Tovee, MJ and PL Cornelissen. Is beauty in the eye of the beholder? Nature. 1998 (396): 321-322.

Zebrowitz, Leslie. 1997. Reading Faces: Window to the Soul? Boulder, Colorado: Westview Press."

Article extracted from: http://www.jyi.org/volumes/volume6/issue6/features/feng.html

Interesting quote of the day on google main page

2005-10-29T11:15:00.000-04:00

Don't ever take a fence down until you know the reason it was put up.
- GK Chesterton

So true.

The Raven

2005-10-29T03:32:00.000-04:00

Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered, weak and weary,
Over many a quaint and curious volume of forgotten lore,
While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping,
As of someone gently rapping, rapping at my chamber door.
" 'Tis some visitor," I muttered, "tapping at my chamber door;
Only this, and nothing more."

Ah, distinctly I remember, it was in the bleak December,
And each separate dying ember wrought its ghost upon the floor.
Eagerly I wished the morrow; vainly I had sought to borrow
From my books surcease of sorrow, sorrow for the lost Lenore,.
For the rare and radiant maiden whom the angels name Lenore,
Nameless here forevermore.

And the silken sad uncertain rustling of each purple curtain
Thrilled me---filled me with fantastic terrors never felt before;
So that now, to still the beating of my heart, I stood repeating,
" 'Tis some visitor entreating entrance at my chamber door,
Some late visitor entreating entrance at my chamber door.
This it is, and nothing more."

Presently my soul grew stronger; hesitating then no longer,
"Sir," said I, "or madam, truly your forgiveness I implore;
But the fact is, I was napping, and so gently you came rapping,
And so faintly you came tapping, tapping at my chamber door,
That I scarce was sure I heard you." Here I opened wide the door;---
Darkness there, and nothing more.

Deep into the darkness peering, long I stood there, wondering, fearing
Doubting, dreaming dreams no mortals ever dared to dream before;
But the silence was unbroken, and the stillness gave no token,
And the only word there spoken was the whispered word,
Lenore?, This I whispered, and an echo murmured back the word,
"Lenore!" Merely this, and nothing more.

Back into the chamber turning, all my soul within me burning,
Soon again I heard a tapping, something louder than before,
"Surely," said I, "surely, that is something at my window lattice.
Let me see, then, what thereat is, and this mystery explore.
Let my heart be still a moment, and this mystery explore.
" 'Tis the wind, and nothing more."

Open here I flung the shutter, when, with many a flirt and flutter,
In there stepped a stately raven, of the saintly days of yore.
Not the least obeisance made he; not a minute stopped or stayed he;
But with mien of lord or lady, perched above my chamber door.
Perched upon a bust of Pallas, just above my chamber door,
Perched, and sat, and nothing more.

Then this ebony bird beguiling my sad fancy into smiling,
By the grave and stern decorum of the countenance it wore,
"Though thy crest be shorn and shaven thou," I said, "art sure no craven,
Ghastly, grim, and ancient raven, wandering from the nightly shore.
Tell me what the lordly name is on the Night's Plutonian shore."
Quoth the raven, "Nevermore."

Much I marvelled this ungainly fowl to hear discourse so plainly,
Though its answer little meaning, little relevancy bore;
For we cannot help agreeing that no living human being
Ever yet was blessed with seeing bird above his chamber door,
Bird or beast upon the sculptured bust above his chamber door,
With such name as "Nevermore."

But the raven, sitting lonely on that placid bust, spoke only
That one word, as if his soul in that one word he did outpour.
Nothing further then he uttered; not a feather then he fluttered;
Till I scarcely more than muttered, "Other friends have flown before;
On the morrow he will leave me, as my hopes have flown before."
Then the bird said, "Nevermore."

Startled at the stillness broken by reply so aptly spoken,
"Doubtless," said I, "what it utters is its only stock and store,
Caught from some unhappy master, whom unmerciful disaster
Followed fast and followed faster, till his songs one burden bore,---
Till the dirges of his hope that melancholy burden bore
Of "Never---nevermore."

But the raven still beguiling all my sad soul into smiling,
Straight I wheeled a cushioned seat in front of bird, and bust and door;
Then, upon the velvet sinking, I betook myself to linking
Fancy unto fancy, thinking what this ominous bird of yore --
What this grim, ungainly, ghastly, gaunt and ominous bird of yore
Meant in croaking "Nevermore."

Thus I sat engaged in guessing, but no syllable expressing
To the fowl, whose fiery eyes now burned into my bosom's core;
This and more I sat divining, with my head at ease reclining
On the cushion's velvet lining that the lamplight gloated o'er,
But whose velvet violet lining with the lamplight gloating o'er
She shall press, ah, nevermore!

Then, methought, the air grew denser, perfumed from an unseen censer
Swung by seraphim whose footfalls tinkled on the tufted floor.
"Wretch," I cried, "thy God hath lent thee -- by these angels he hath
Sent thee respite---respite and nepenthe from thy memories of Lenore!
Quaff, O quaff this kind nepenthe, and forget this lost Lenore!"
Quoth the raven, "Nevermore!"

"Prophet!" said I, "thing of evil!--prophet still, if bird or devil!
Whether tempter sent, or whether tempest tossed thee here ashore,
Desolate, yet all undaunted, on this desert land enchanted--
On this home by horror haunted--tell me truly, I implore:
Is there--is there balm in Gilead?--tell me--tell me I implore!"
Quoth the raven, "Nevermore."

"Prophet!" said I, "thing of evil--prophet still, if bird or devil!
By that heaven that bends above us--by that God we both adore--
Tell this soul with sorrow laden, if, within the distant Aidenn,
It shall clasp a sainted maiden, whom the angels name Lenore---
Clasp a rare and radiant maiden, whom the angels name Lenore?
Quoth the raven, "Nevermore."

"Be that word our sign of parting, bird or fiend!" I shrieked, upstarting--
"Get thee back into the tempest and the Night's Plutonian shore!
Leave no black plume as a token of that lie thy soul hath spoken!
Leave my loneliness unbroken! -- quit the bust above my door!
Take thy beak from out my heart, and take thy form from off my door!"
Quoth the raven, "Nevermore."

And the raven, never flitting, still is sitting, still is sitting
On the pallid bust of Pallas just above my chamber door;
And his eyes have all the seeming of a demon's that is dreaming.
And the lamplight o'er him streaming throws his shadow on the floor;
And my soul from out that shadow that lies floating on the floor
Shall be lifted---nevermore!

-- EA Poe

Google to take over the world

2005-10-27T15:29:00.000-04:00

"Is Google Taking Over The World?

Google started out a few years ago as a project at Stanford and has turned into one of the biggets internet companies around. Google is now a household name, its own verb, and a search engine that’s swiffering the internet. Recently, Google has released services like Google Talk, Gmail, Google Desktop Search, as well as Google Video, Google Print and a slew of other thing connected with the google name. Google tells its engineers to use a part of their worktime for personal projects and some of them, like Google Talk, make it to internet users. With talk of a Google OS in the future, it’s likely that they’ll branch out to main essentials of life, creating:

and

Also, it’s predicted that in about 50-75 years, Google will have completely taken over EVERYTHING. From food, to stores, PCs and Macs will converge with the added Google OS. You’ll leave your house (sponsored by Google) and walk down the street to the Google Coffee Shop on Google 3rd Street and make your way to work, at Google Talk International, because telephone’s will be a thing of the past since they were all taken over by Google as they shut down Verizon and Cingular and implemented Google Talk across the globe. In around 2110, we will start to hear rumors of a new service from Google, known as:

Or maybe not, you never know…"
From http://thefifthrule.com/T5R/?p=52

My goal in blogs!

2005-10-27T01:11:00.000-04:00

How about this, any of you readers wanna donate any money, just leave a comment, i accept all forms of payments hehe.

I will try to earn 1Million $ like this dude: http://milliondollarhomepage.com
The internet seriously is a goldmine for those with the right tools. Be it of convincing, or advertisements, or whatever.

Help me reach my goal, try to help me get this blog started. Any ideas for topic of discussion?

When Apple merged with Google to take over the world.

2005-10-25T13:42:00.000-04:00

It would be the end of ALL OTHER SOFTWARE.
The empire would take over the Darkside (MS), destroy them. Leave but a pulp of geek meat, and shredded glasses.
This is the story of of two internet web-giants who got together one beautiful day to take over the world.

Apple:

iPod Video

New iPods to come

Google:

Google hires Gaim developper

Hot cars slim wants

2005-10-24T13:32:00.000-04:00

Aston martin vanquish 1. Looks aggressive, yet relaxed!

Viril looking vehicle. Pretty hot too. Alpha romeo

Getting chicks...without doing much

2005-10-24T11:32:00.000-04:00

Here's my bite of the chunk, this is something i CAN talk about, because it's one of those (unintentionally) tried, tested, and true methods, now backed by some theory (psych. class).

Some if not most people will say all this is just obvious but don't try it, or maybe you're a 5 star jeweled covered pimp.

One note: you dont get as socially inept as me, so i'm a classical AFC (average frustrated chump) absolutely not talking to chicks.

Similarities from each event of chicks approaching me showing they wanted to give ME a chance:

Take a lot of room; i'm pretty tall so when i stay relaxed i do take a lot of room, but pretty much anyone can take a lot of room by just stretching out, also clothes can help make you look bigger, larger, spatious. But in some cases i was just standing taking space with non biggorifying clothes and chicks approached me.Relaxed position would be:

when sitting let your legs loosen out straight, stretch your arms out, not too much if you're a sorta introverted person because it will make people think you've got something cooked up if they complain.
When standing, lay back on the wall, feet crossed with the tip of one foot touching the floor (classical P.I.M.P looking posture).

If you wanna put your hands in your pocket, leave your thumbs hooking outside of the pocket.

A big hairdoe helps sometimes getting you noticed, but once again people with big hair sometimes look like they're talkative, otehrwise they look like absolute geeks.
When walking, even if you walk weird for whatever reason, try to keep a slow, relaxed pace, taking long steps, so that even if you walk weird or oddly, it'll show you're relaxed, taking your time.
Stand tall keeping your head up, try to keep straight too.
In most (all except 2 or 3) situations where i've been approached, i was with a friend or another person too, if you are, you might as well talk to him, gesticulate too and be very concerned about the subject of discussion, this is one MAJOR similarity in the situations where i was with people and got picked up, i guess it shows you're somewhat talkative.
Of course grooming, essential, but i've been approached ( twice, well...once, the second time i DID reply to the chick, and so i probably made an extra effort to get her to stay and show signs of interest i guess) when absolutely not prepared for approach, of course all of the above is sorta second nature to me (and no i didnt learn it anywhere i guess i just learned from my observing dad)
and last but not least, be heading somewhere look like you've got a mission to attend to (words might be abusive in this sentence).

So that pretty much sums it up.

Of course i am still a complete AFC, and although above i talk about situations where the chicks stayed talking to me or doing whatever for anything between 2-10 min, expecting a reaction from me, i absolutely said nothing (except 1 situation, but my being afc made it that i fucked the discussion into boring subject matters lol, but at least i kept her for like 30 min).

Keeping the above attitude at all time could also help if you're going to approach yourself, and going to do the first step etc. (i'd testify here too, but situation is not mentionable at the moment)

PVR, DVD, Sound system automated television control

2005-10-23T23:02:00.000-04:00

All that in your old unused computer stored in the shed or garage!

That is a brilliant UAI to develop. Very useful.
Ill get to it asap, if you can help me out, leave a note.

A home made Personal MEDIA STATION.

I've seen Sony, panasonic, and other technology giants machines for central control of television and other media contents in one house, but i've been wanting to code this for a while, so here goes nothing, any information appreciated here are some links to start with:

Tom's hardware: Home theater PC.

Linux media center PC

Extreme Tech review: TiVo killers

Buildng a Slim PVR

XBox site seems interesting.

i'll update more links on the right side tab.

I've seen an XBOX with mod chip serving as sort of a multifunctional mediacenter, the whole technology is very promising, and i'd like to get my bite of the cake while i still can.

Lines to an indian air

2005-10-23T20:30:00.000-04:00

I arise from dreams of the,
in the first sweet sleep of night,
when the winds are breathing low,
and the stars are shining bright.
I arise from dreams of the,
and a spirit in my feet,
it brings me, who knows how,
to thy chamber-window sweet.

The wandering airs they faint,
in the dark the silent stream,
The champak odours fail,
like sweet thoughts in a dream,
The nightingale's complaint,
it dies upon thy heart,
as i must die on thine,
o beloved as though art.

O lift me from the grass,
I die, I faint, I fail,
let thy love in kisses rain,
on my lips and eyelids pale,
my cheek is cold and white alas,
but my heart beats loud and fast.
Oh, press it close to thine again,
where it shall stop at last.

-- B. Shelley

Secret of the jerk

2005-10-22T19:05:00.000-04:00

Pook writes:
"
(NOTE: This post ended up being longer than I expected, MUCH LONGER. "You should have divided it in many posts." Why write a galaxy of posts when one article will do!)

No, your eyes are not mistaken. The guy with the beautiful woman is a jerk and/or ugly guy! What is he doing with her? Can she not see? Has she not eyes?

Alas! The poor male looks around, knows not who to turn to, and eventually sums up that the universe is a cruel and mysterious personnage who deals out no answers, offers no solutions, and gives out no explanations especially for the enigma of all enigmas, the beautiful woman! Obviously, something is amiss. How do these ugly to average looking guys get such babes? How do these cruel, stupid, barbaric males get these feminine jewels? Are they following a special trick? Are they super 'confidant'? What is their secret? Or are they even aware of their secret?

But what if nothing is amiss? What if this is all correct to the will of Nature? Where leaves the Don Juan?

Oh, there she is! The beautiful woman! The ornament of the world! The dream in flesh! She stands aloof on the platform and says, "Gentlemen! How are you to win me?"

And around the platform, a thousand mouths cry:

"Confidence."
"Humor."
"Patterns."
"Kino."
"Chocolate."
"Poetry."
"By ignoring you."
"By totally focusing on you."
"Puffed muscles."
"Flowers."
"Spikey hair."
"Endless gifts."
"Mirroring."
"Leather jackets."
"Eliciting values."
"Sparkly clothes."
"Bouncy personality."
"Romance."
"Dinner. Lobster!"
"Compliments."
"Guitar songs."

And she laughs only to say, "These are very well and good, gentlemen. But are you not aware that imitation is suicide? You forget that confidence is experience, that puffed muscles are not to be a masculine dress, that any guy can buy me lobster, and that countless many can sing the guitar songs. Are you so unaware of what I need?"

But a lone voice speaks from the floor: "You, madam, are to win me! For I am the prize to be won!"

And with that, she giggles in glee. "For every one of you, there are a thousand guys willing to offer me the above. It is cute that you are different. But why am I with the ugly guy at the end? Why do I prefer the jerk?" And with this the lone voice had no answer.

Then comes the great exclamation: "Because he is a man!"

"Yes but no," she snobbily laughs.

"Because he is disrespectful."

"He is that but no."

"Because he is an animal."

"Not at all!"

"Because he has super ego!"

"True, but no."

"Because he wears his cap backwards!"

"Hah!"

"Because he is rough and mean."

"Nope!"

And then a golden arrow shaft of voice pierced the confusion, penetrated deep within the truth, spread those warm gooey moans of ecstasy throughout, and made her come with such surprising clarity that she screams in delight. For the voice said,

"Extreme masculinity!"

"Oh Pook!" she smiled in radiance. "How right you are!" And all the guys' mouths turn into a big O as the beautiful woman ran off the platform into the arms of Pook.

Having satisfied none of her demands, what she ends up with (the ugly/average guy) becomes seemingly contradictory. Extreme masculinity? What answer can that be?

Oh women! Can you give us no explanations other than the ones that send us off the cliff? Can you not explain yourselves to our perplexed male minds? Alas, it is like speaking to a block. She gives expressions but not answers. She gives demands but not secrets. How smart men may be until they enter a bar! How knowledgable they seem until they're before a woman!

The Mystery of Mysteries

There are three mysteries to the world: the rise and fall of civilizations, fruitcake, and why beautiful women go for jerks.

Leaving fruitcake and the rise and fall of civilizations for other posts, let us concern ourselves with why beautiful women go for jerks. WHAT IS NATURE'S SECRET?

And, likewise, a sea of mouths with authoritative tongues chant out the usual 'answers':

"Confidence"
"Dominance
"Unpredictability"
"Hard to get"
"Selfishness"
"Rudeness"

And so on. These 'experts' or 'wise sages' merely look at the jerk as a fixed element and classify personality traits or even physical traits. Fools adopt the personality/physical traits. But imitation is suicide.

Why go for the fool's gold when the real gold is in your grasp?

There are things so simple in Nature and life that we utterly confuse them and ourselves with our stupid philosophies (jerks don't need websites like these!). Sexuality is one of these. Our countless reading of seduction over the internet is full of months if not years. Where has this got you? Yes, you feel you are always right on the edge of THE SECRETS to end your heartaches and tensions but, at the end of the day, you are still in front of your computer.

Someone said to me, "What an odd definition of Man you gave, Pook! A guy not afraid of his testosterone? Surely it is more heroic."

But it is entirely about testosterone. Girls are attracted to GUYS, not wimps, not nice guys, not chumps, but GUYS. Rather then trying to build and discover some killer philosophy to ease your troubles, why not accept the structure Nature has already set up? The secret of the jerks is that it is so widespread, common, and plain that since it is all around us we can't even distinguish it.

Nature is process, always seeking and devouring. Nothing remains set; everything's in cycles. Rather than classifying the ACTIONS of the jerk and merely DUPLICATING them, let us adopt the SOURCE so the actions come natural and without thought or effort.

Pook stands on the fruitcake and calls the crowd around him.

Gentlemen! Do say: what type of woman will the Nicest Nice Guy attract?

"Sperm whales."
"Hags."
"B*tches."
"Uglo girls."

Indeed! What trait commonly unites all these girls that end up with the pathetic Nice Guy?

Silence.

Gentlemen! Your silence most offends me! Sure, these girls may be sweet. Sure, they may be smart. Sure, they may be many things. Yet, there is one thing that they aren't. They are not feminine. They are not girlish.

The men nod.

And, likewise, what are these Nice Guys, these blobs of appeasing rolls of gooish flesh? Are these the men of the world?

"NO!"

These boys are not exactly feminine, but they certainly aren't masculine. They are neither. They are the androgenous blob who, without a spine, is clay to fit to any woman's desires or whims. Nice guys love women as a drowner loves a life preserver. He clings on to her because he cannot swim the waters of Nature. Tossed and tossed he becomes through his love life.

The Masculine Male

Pook walks toward a bubbly Nice Guy with a needle of Man-ness.

"No! The prick will hurt me!"

Fine, die a painful long death of Regret, Loneliness, and Frustration. Any other takers?

Another Nice Guy volunteered.

See? This fella knows that a momentary pain is prefarable to consistant suffering.

Pook puts the shot into the Nice Guy and injects him with testosterone.

Now, gentlemen, watch the effects.

The Nice Guy no longer fears what he desires. He sees the woman he wants. He approaches her.

Why do jerks approach women? To marry them? No! The jerk is operating not out of control with 'that head down there' but rather being influenced properly by his testosterone. He sees what he wants and goes and gets it. He does not apologize for it. He does not try to rationalize it. He does not analyze it. There are no stupid philosophies running around in the jerk's head.

The Nice Guy gets rejected by the woman!

Oh oh! Poor Nice Guy! But look, something is changing. Look at the anger building up in him. Something is being charged within him. It is frustration. It is anger. The worst thing for him to do would be to cry and duck his head in the sand. Constant rejection requires one of two solutions: either lower your standards or increase your standards in yourself.

But it is true that standards do not enter the jerk's mind. He gets frustrated and angry. He tries again with MUCH LESS awkardness. Nature's system is at work here, chiseling his social exterior. He gets the dates.

The Nice Guy gets dumped after a few dates.

Oh dear! What happened!? Why, perhaps the Nice Guy was trying to mock earlier jerk behavior and remetamorphed into an AFC eventually before his chick! Imitation IS suicide. No wonder chicks are so hard for honesty!

Do jerks really care on pleasing the women in the spirit of altruism and glorious relationship?

"Yes."

Hush you! The jerks obviously DO NOT care about the women in such a manner. Their testosterone says, "I have needs that need to be fulfilled. Entertain me." And so the jerks come off self-centered not because they ARE self-centered, but because they are closer to their own male nature and seek to satisfy their thirst.

The nice guy sees that fun is merely being around a beautiful woman. The jerk is a bit more... active. He wants to have fun his way. She is along for the ride.

It has been well known that action dates (ex: dancing, bowling, rock climbing, etc.) work MUCH BETTER than regular dates (coffee, dinner, movie, etc). Rather than merely matching the effect (the action date), let us focus on the cause.

The jerk would obviously skateboard and play basketball than to sit at dinner and watch the girl flap her gums. Testosterone has been shown to create more ACTION in the individual. Jerks (i.e. testosteronized males) do the action NATURALLY. Rather than worrying about making yourself do action dates, get yourself in that natureset and action dates will become the only comfortable choice you could make.

The Nice Guy gets dumped because he hardly made any moves.

Oh no! We know how the girl gets mistreated and will talk to her girly friend (the nice guy) about it. We see the abuse and we think, "Oh heavens! Am I to be abusive to get the girl?" What is this abuse? Is she really hurt? Or is she merely mad that she has failed in her mission: to sterilize and link to the masculinized dude?

"But the guy stands her up all the time, etc. etc."

It is not because he stands her up. It is because she knows she is not loved by him. Her feminine powers are not ensnaring him. It is a feminine failure.

The girl sleeps with the jerk and he leaves her. We, as guys, think the abuse is the jerk sleeping with the girl merely to 'use' her (and motherly harpies try to feminize us into not doing 'this'). Rather, the 'abuse' is that the girl realizes she could not keep the guy. She 'was not woman enough'.

Nature's Path Leads to Women

As men, we are governed by two masters: Mind and Nature. (NOT mind and body. Nature refers to the processes and cycles that our bodies are only but a part.)

Both fight one another.

Mind: "The finest philosophies will get us the women."

Nature: "You bore me. Unleash me."

But what will get the women?

Mind: "Calculation. Seduction."

Nature: "Instinct. Masculinity."

And why should you get any women?

Mind: "Because everyone else is, and I am not."

Nature: "Because I am MALE and she is FEMALE."

Now let us throw some obstacles at the two. Let us say they are unceasingly unsuccessful in obtaining the beautiful women.

What are your reactions?

Mind: "This is obviously a failure within my calculation, my framing of the events. I will solve this with more seduction

research, essay writing on message boards, for I treat sexual dynamics like an academic degree."

Nature: "The failure is in not being male enough. Increased masculinity is the solution."

But you who enraged the poets and tortured the philosophers, please please elaborate.

Nature: When the embryo is at three months, it is unisex. It is both sexes at once. Alas, from then it divides into a gender (of which we cannot choose, of which enforces a code of conduct and duties of behavior we cannot control or understand. And we call ourselves free...)

Mind: Yes, yes. One half turns male, the other female. It is in my books.

Nature: Then I shall burn your library. For Nature always has more secrets then you can decipher. Gender is not all or none.

There is a MIX.

Mind: But this is in my books. In Sex and Character, Weineger says that from birth, males and females are divided. Some males are 70% male, 30% female. Others are 80% male, 20% female. It is vice versa for women. We know of effininate men. We know of tom boys. Attraction is not a choice. A male that is 60% male and 40% female will attract a female that is 60% female and 40% male. A female that is 90% female and 10% male will attract a male that is 90% male and 10% female. It is a fact that some men are more feminine than others. This attraction scale is destiny: we mate with what fills the void the best. This is the mix that Weineger speaks of, is marked in the very first chapter of his book and made everything else possible.

Nature: I wonder if you would talk then till doomsday? Your followers, your philosophers, lawyers, academics, prattle and rattle on just like you! You are completely unaware of the seasons of life that color and sparkle the world. But I hesitate!

Mind: Like the flow and ebb of the moon.

Nature: Quiet you! Weineger and others of his ilk made good attempts at trying to discover my secrets. They tried to 'pop' themselves out of my earthly cycle and peer upon my work with the eyes of a god. Melancholy is my vengeance. Nieztche and Keirkegard, I drove those two mad. For Weineger I made his life so unpleasant that he had to shoot himself.

Mind: Is this your only vengeance?

Nature: No. It is reserved for anyone who frustrates my cycle. A man who persistantly stays single becomes a public temptation. I chisel away at him to make him more appropriate and correct the purpose of getting the women and carrying on my work.

Mind: But he will not do this. And your melancholy will not work due to the female attention he recieves.

Nature: I make and unmake the Adonis. The beautiful boy, refusing to use my gift for my purpose, enjoys being slaughtered by the elephant's tusk, the early untimely death. I will not be defied.

Mind: Yet, Weineger explained you.

Nature: Fool! Your 'mix' is all wrong. It is true that it is not simply 'male' and 'female'. But there is androgenous, where the male levels are so low in the male that he is barely a male. Or that the female levels are so low in the female that she is barely a female.

Mind: You divided us before birth.

Nature: And I inject you again with my touch at puberty. The boy must become a man and the girl a woman. But, alas, many attempt to buck my ways to follow YOU. Nerds, geeks, we know the labels. The longer a man tries to ignore the fact of my mission and cycle, the more pain and loneliness I will add into him until he has no choice to act.

Mind: You are vicious.

Nature: It gets the job done. But Weineger is wrong. We are not born onto a spectrum. Rather, we can add to it or decrease it. The element of attraction is destruction.

Mind: Destruction?

Nature: If a woman is amazingly female, what is the result?

Mind: Hordes of men hunt after her.

Nature: Yes. Extremeness of spectrum is an anomaly that must be seeked out and destroyed. The female is feminine with matter. Girls at an early age are aware the effects their bodies have on young men. They know they are like a magnet. But who do they go for? The beautiful woman is the extreme female? Why, she is seeking the extreme male. By the actions of the jerk, who can say that he is not looking for destruction? He finds it in her and she finds it in him. I demand sterilization of the two. The more successes they have, the more and more it is drained from them. Eventually, they settle for one mate and begin the march toward the androgenous.

Mind: So the beautiful woman is attracted to the jerk because...

Nature: It is better to say that the extreme female woman is attracted to the extreme male man.

And this is the utterly simple secret. Jerks are not super confidant, not superior in all seduction knowledge. Jerks are testosteronized males. This seperates them from the Nice Guys who still defy the flooding of testosterone Nature inflicts on them.

Science of Testosterone

Be a Man!: "A Man is one who is not afraid of his testosterone."

This will seem incredibly basic. But to illustrate the effects, look at the effects of men who must be injected with artificial testosterone because (for whatever reason) their body isn't making enough (usually due to having HIV).

One HIV positive guy shares his differences with the before and after shots:

His weight increases from 165 pounds to 185 pounds. The collar size goes from 15 to 17 1/2, the chest from 40 to 44. His appetite expands beyond measure. Before he was constantly napping. Now he has enough energy for daily workouts and strict work schedules. Before, depression was a regular feature. Now, it is a 'distant memory'. With the testosterone shots, he feels better to recover from life's curveballs, more persistant, more alive.

There are more effects. With the testosterone, he feels more energy. The attention span shortens. He finds it harder to concentrate on writing and feels he must exercise. The wit becomes quicker, the mind faster, and the judgement more impulsive. It is literally a 'rush'.

Without the testosterone, he finds himself more reserved. The energy still is there but is geared towards interaction rather than action, toward pride rather than lust. He rarely looks for dates or thinks of approaching women without it. But with it, he is constantly scanning the women for potential dates and socializing.

With testosterone comes increased debating type attitudes, and increased anger. Driving makes him scream at the other cars and 'stupid drivers'. (This is oddly reminiscent of Thomas Jefferson's personality when he was always said to be 'unemotional' except when riding a horse and became 'overly' emotional.) With testosterone comes increased impatience, increased edginess, but increased self-confidence.

Now do these traits of the under-testosteronized male and over-testosteronized male match the Nice Guy and Jerk? They do most accurately.

For the rest, we require a scientist.

A scientist appears.

There you are! Oh, Mr. Scientist, do tell us more about Testosterone.

"I'd love to, Pook.

"Testosterone, oddly enough, is a chemical closely related to cholesterol. It was first isolated by a Dutch scientist in 1935 from mice testicles and successfully synthesized by the German biologist Adolf Butenandt. Although testosterone is often thought of as the definition of maleness, both men and women produce it. Men produce it in their testicles; women produce it in their ovaries and adrenal glands. The male body converts some testosterone to estradiol, a female hormone, and the female body has receptors for testosterone, just as the male body does. That's why women who want to change their sex are injected with testosterone and develop male characteristics, like deeper voices, facial hair and even baldness. The central biological difference between adult men and women, then, is not that men have testosterone and women don't. It's that men produce much, much more of it than women do. An average woman has 40 to 60 nanograms of testosterone in a deciliter of blood plasma. An average man has 300 to 1,000 nanograms per deciliter."

Ok, ok, Mr. Scientist. You are putting this Pook to sleep. The EFFECTS of testosterone. Focus on the EFFECTS.

"Certainly, Pook.

"Testosterone's effects start early -- really early. At conception, every embryo is female and unless hormonally altered will remain so. You need testosterone to turn a fetus with a Y chromosome into a real boy, to masculinize his brain and body. Men experience a flood of testosterone twice in their lives: in the womb about six weeks after conception and at puberty. The first fetal burst primes the brain and the body, endowing male fetuses with the instinctual knowledge of how to respond to later testosterone surges. The second, more familiar adolescent rush -- squeaky voices, facial hair and all -- completes the process."

Go on.

"The effect of testosterone is systemic. It engenders both the brain and the body. Apart from the obvious genital distinction, other differences between men's and women's bodies reflect this: body hair, the ratio of muscle to fat, upper-body strength and so on. But testosterone leads to behavioral differences as well. Since it is unethical to experiment with human embryos by altering hormonal balances, much of the evidence for this idea is based on research conducted on animals. A Stanford research group, for example, as reported in Deborah Blum's book "Sex on the Brain," injected newborn female rats with testosterone. Not only did the female rats develop penises from their clitorises, but they also appeared fully aware of how to use them."

What!

"Indeed. But let me continue."

Yes, I am sorry.

"And these female rats were trying to have sex with other females with merry abandon. Male rats who had their testosterone locked after birth, on the other hand, saw their penises wither or disappear entirely and presented themselves to the female rats in a passive, receptive way. Other scientists, theorizing that it was testosterone that enabled male zebra finches to sing, injected mute female finches with testosterone. Sure enough, the females sang. Species in which the female is typically more aggressive, like hyenas in female-run clans, show higher levels of testosterone among the females than among the males. Female sea snipes, which impregnate the males, and leave them to stay home and rear the young, have higher testosterone levels than their mates. Typical "male" behavior, in other words, corresponds to testosterone levels, whether exhibited by chromosomal males or females."

But does this apply to Humans?

"The evidence certainly suggests that it does, though much of the "proof" is inferred from accidents. Pregnant women who were injected with progesterone (chemically similar to testosterone) in the 1950's to avoid miscarriage had daughters who later reported markedly tomboyish childhoods."

Incredible!

"Ditto girls born with a disorder that causes their adrenal glands to produce a hormone like testosterone rather than the more common cortisol. The moving story, chronicled in John Colapinto's book "As Nature Made Him," of David Reimer, who as an infant was surgically altered after a botched circumcision to become a girl, suggests how long-lasting the effect of fetal testosterone can be. Despite a ruthless attempt to socialize David as a girl, and to give him the correct hormonal treatment to develop as one, his behavioral and psychological makeup was still ineradicably male. Eventually, with the help of more testosterone, he became a full man again. Female-to-male transsexuals report a similar transformation when injected with testosterone. One, Susan/Drew Seidman, described her experience in The Village Voice last November. 'My sex-drive went through the roof,' Seidman recalled. 'I felt like I had to have sex once a day or I would die. . . . I was into porn as a girl, but now I'm really into porn.' For Seidman, becoming a man was not merely physical. Thanks to testosterone, it was also psychological."

So what makes a Man?

"I don't know what exactly makes a man. But one thing I can tell you for sure: it is not his penis."

Oh wise sage! Wonderful scientist!

But do not confuse testosterone with Popeye's spinach. Nature says, "Testosterone levels will rise when the situation warrants it. Survival is the priority." So in cases of danger, of war, the testosterone levels increase. When in a strip club or viewing a porno website, testosterone levels also rise. Men with higher testosterone achieve psychological dominance, have high self esteem, and move through the world with natural confidence.

"But Pook. I have more to add."

Tarry! Then I will step aside and let you speak.

"Testosterone is clearly correlated in both men and women with psychological dominance, confident physicality and high self-esteem. In most combative, competitive environments, especially physical ones, the person with the most testosterone wins. Put any two men in a room together and the one with more testosterone will tend to dominate the interaction."

Gentlemen, this is your secret 'ingredient' to that 'alpha-maleness' you keep longing for.

"Working women have higher levels of testosterone than women who stay at home, and the daughters of working women have higher levels of testosterone than the daughters of housewives. A 1996 study found that in lesbian couples in which one partner assumes the male, or "butch," role and another assumes the female, or "femme," role, the "butch" woman has higher levels of testosterone than the "femme" woman."

Ahh! So in lesbian couples, one acts male and the other acts female.

"In naval medical tests, midshipmen have been shown to have higher average levels of testosterone than plebes. Actors tend to have more testosterone than ministers, according to a 1990 study. Among 700 male prison inmates in a 1995 study, those with the highest testosterone levels tended to be those most likely to be in trouble with the prison authorities and to engage in unprovoked violence. This is true among women as well as among men, according to a 1997 study of 87 female inmates in a maximum security prison."

Whohoo! The key to dominance!

"Careful Pook.

"Although high testosterone levels often correlate with dominance in interpersonal relationships, it does not guarantee more social power. Testosterone levels are higher among blue-collar workers, for example, than among white-collar workers, according to a study of more than 4,000 former military personnel conducted in 1992."

But is testosterone like adrenaline? Or does it respond to long-term surrounding environment stimuli?

"Well Pook, studies have shown that inner-city youths, often exposed to danger in high-crime neighborhoods, may generate higher testosterone levels than unthreatened, secluded suburbanites. And so high testosterone levels may not merely be responses to a violent environment; they may subsequently add to it in what becomes an increasingly violent, sexualized cycle."

Increase in violence AND sexuality? Then it's no accident that testosterone-soaked ghettos foster both high levels of crime and high levels of illegitimacy!

"Indeed, Pook. In the same way, declines in violence and crime may allow testosterone levels to drop among young inner-city males, generating a virtuous trend of further reductions in crime and birth rates. This may help to explain why crime can decline precipitously, rather than drift down slowly, over time."

But what for the men who enter that dungeon, I mean marriage?

"Studies have also shown that men in long-term marriages see their testosterone levels progressively fall and their sex drives subsequently decline. It is as if their wives successfully tame them, reducing their sexual energy to a level where it is more unlikely to seek extramarital outlets. A 1993 study showed that single men tended to have higher levels of testosterone than married men and that men with high levels of testosterone turned out to be more likely to have had a failed marriage. Of course, if you start out with higher testosterone levels, you may be more likely to fail at marriage, stay in the sexual marketplace, see your testosterone increase in response to this and so on."

So what is the entire point, Mr. Brainy Guy?

"This, then, is what it comes down to: testosterone is a facilitator of risk -- physical, criminal, personal. Without the
influence of testosterone, the cost of these risks might seem to far outweigh the benefits. But with testosterone charging through the brain, caution is thrown to the wind. The influence of testosterone may not always lead to raw physical confrontation. In men with many options it may influence the decision to invest money in a dubious enterprise, jump into an ill-advised sexual affair or tell an egregiously big whopper. At the time, all these decisions may make some sort of testosteroned sense."

It sounds like you are describing a US politician.

"Hush Pook."

Oh, I'm sorry. Continue.

"The effects of testosterone are not secret; neither is the fact that men have far more if it than women. But why? As we have seen, testosterone is not synonymous with gender; in some species, it is the female who has most of it. The relatively new science of evolutionary psychology offers perhaps the best explanation for why that's not the case in humans. For neo-Darwinians, the aggressive and sexual aspects of testosterone are related to the division of labor among hunter-gatherers in our ancient but formative evolutionary past. This division -- men in general hunted, women in general gathered -- favored differing levels of testosterone. Women need some testosterone -- for self-defense, occasional risk-taking, strength -- but not as much as men. Men use it to increase their potential to defeat rivals, respond to physical threats in strange environments, maximize their physical attractiveness, prompt them to spread their genes as widely as possible and defend their home if necessary."

But women are attracted, in the physical imagery sense, to the feminine looking guys. How can testosterone increase physical attractiveness? I do not understand.

"But the picture, as most good evolutionary psychologists point out, is more complex than this. Men who are excessively testosteroned are not that attractive to most women. Although they have the genes that turn women on -- strong jaws and pronounced cheekbones, for example, are correlated with high testosterone -- they can also be precisely the unstable, highly sexed creatures that childbearing, stability-seeking women want to avoid. There are two ways, evolutionary psychologists hazard, that women have successfully squared this particular circle. One is to marry the sweet class nerd and have an affair with the college quarterback: that way you get the good genes, the good sex and the stable home."

This has always been the problem. Nice Guy or Jerk?

"There is a third path."

A third way? And what is it?

"The third way is to find a man with variable testosterone levels, who can be both stable and nurturing when you want him to be and yet become a muscle-bound, bristly gladiator when the need arises. This is sadly more easily said than done."

Ahh! The secret is to CONTROL the sexuality or else it will control you! The jerk is entirely controlled by it. The Nice Guy recoils from the abuses he sees in the jerk and becomes merely static on the woman's radar.

To be a jerk in control of his sexuality is to cease being 'jerk-like'. For Nature has set up this game of life we all play.

Learn the system and work within it.

No Nice Guy in Animal World

Now we require a farmer.

A farmer appears.

What are the effects of testosterone on animals?

The farmer looks at Pook as if he was crazy.

Yes, the effects.

"Well, one thing with animals is that the female is usually the one more in heat, always searching for sex, than the male. Take female pigs. They go completely beserk."

Go on.

"But it is exactly what that scientist said. Nature dashes some tesosterone to create the male at first. Then, at puberty, Nature floods the male with testosterone. If you neuter the animal before this flood, you will have a great pet."

And if you don't?

"Well, you end up with an unhappy beast. Male pigs must be neutered or the testosterone will flood the body, making its meat worthless. This is why we don't eat bull."

So our animal friends, when testostoronized, are merely to mate? There is no other strength in it?

"That isn't true. If you neuter the dog before he gets testosteronized, he makes a great pet. But he will not make a good sheepdog. It's almost like his will of action gets taken out."

And so is the same with Humans! What do Nice Guys become but human pets for the female? And just as animals use their sexuality for action, for a higher purpose, so do Humans.

The Women Agree

Even on this site's discussion of 'Nice Guys versus Jerks', read what some of what the women had to say.

Italics will be the woman. Regular text will be da Pook Man.

First Lady

Alright, I read some of your responses from women and noticed that most of them seemed older.

And probably uglier! It is the pretty chicks we want. Too bad pictures weren't included with their words!

And since a lot of guys who go here seem to be around my age (17), I figured I would put my 2 cents in.

Here it comes...

I don't like the nice guy. To me he's a definite turn off. He seems too timid to pursue intimacy, and personally I love it when a guy is real horny (as long as he's attractive and knows when to stop). It makes me feel a lot more comfortable.

Too timid to pursue intimacy! Perhaps he needs a shot of testosterone? Notice how she loves a guy being horny (just not a
stupid type of horny). She feels COMFROTABLE when the guy is following his nature rather than acting out stupid philosophies.

I'm not saying I like jerks, I like the funny guy who always has something interesting or colorful to say. Normally girls look for someone of their 'niceness quotient' or lower. Feeling like the jerk in the relationship is no fun. Of course, neither is being the '*****' so it's totally up to the chick. Maybe u nice guys should get a bit more bold, not necessarily
'jerk-ish'

Fortune favors the bold.

Second Lady

Women start to see the light in their late twenties. Some men never do.

As women get older, they become less feminine in that they are rapidly aging. Yes, Nice Guys can get girls. All the girls we DON'T want.

My advice to the nice guys whose decency might be hampering their dating success is to widen the pool of women they consider.

Translated: go for uglier/older girls.

A current philosophy among some (male) dating gurus is to never date a woman over 30, as they are too set in their ways, hate men, and are starting to lose their looks anyway. Wrong, wrong, wrong!

Older women have developed depth of character, have learned that "nice guys" are the way to go, and are in their sexual prime. In addition, they know who they are sexually, and are unashamed and unafraid to experiment and to take and give pleasure. Sex with a woman over 35 might be some of the best sex a man will ever have.

Over 35! She can't have many children by then! At that age she is losing her purpose of sexuality.

The problem with dating women under 25, which seems to be the goal for many men of all age groups, is that one will have to contend with the image-seeking behavior of youth. Unless a man is equally shallow and image-driven---and most men over 30 are not---women in their 30s, 40s, and up can be a goldmine of interesting and wonderful experiences.

We know that the young women go for the jerks. But notice how the desexualized male (i.e. Nice Guy) wins with the desexualized female (i.e. women in their 30s and 40s)?

Third Woman

I date only nice guys. Most women want to date a nice guy. But men are being classified into two groups, nice or jerks.

That doesn't cover the subject. People are more complex than that. Neither sex can be grouped into just two groups.

Of course.

The "NICE GUY" is often a man who doesn't have a life. And neither sex is attracted to this type of person. A truly nice guy is hard to find. A true jerk most women don't want. I think we try to make people fit into a category instead of getting to know them. You can't always know what a woman wants based on another woman's choices.

Why not? Women seem to follow the same pattern of going for the jerk.

It is true that the Nice Guy has no life. It is because he lacks the ACTION that the jerk has.

I love a nice guy. To me nothing is sexier than a guy who has the guts to say he really likes me on a first date. And yes I do continue dating him! I must clear one last thing up "Nice guys do FINISH last" and I find that to be very sexy! He is the one I'll see again.

This woman must be fat or old or something.

Fourth Girl

Sorry, but its no more true that women prefer jerks than it is true that men prefer *****es.

The thing is, the nice guys who are with a woman are not out there complaining that women don't like nice guys. The nice guys who are not with a woman will express their loneliness, in a nice way, from time to time. The jerks who are not with a woman never complain about it. They lie and say they do have a woman, or many women, or they don't want a woman. Nice guys don't lie like that.

The jerk is a challenge. The nice guy wants to go on Oprah's show.

The truth is that nice guys are alone from time to time. The truth is that there are plenty of people out there looking for the right one. Keep looking, you will find her.

It is interesting that women are all united in the belief that there is 'one for everyone'. It's as if they are well aware of Nature's invisible hand demanding union.

PS. You are a guy, right, so looks are very important to you? Lets say you think you could not be with less than an "8".

I know huge compromise is not possible, but just try to accept a "7" or a "6" perhaps. Women get a lot better looking TO YOU after you know and love them. Give it a try. If I had a brother and he was a nice guy, the above advice is what I would have given him.

Notice how many of these women are missing the point here. The point is to get the BEAUTIFUL WOMEN. Some of these girl's solutions is to not go for the beautiful ones!

But all the attributes of the jerk they love (the action, the horniness, the unpredictability, the exciting life) are all effects of a testosteronized male.

Fifth Girl

I don't think that women are attracted to jerks, but they are attracted to men that illuminate power. Those type of men(powerful, strong and masculine) are sometimes jerks, which accounts for the confusion.

Finally! A woman links the jerk to masculinity. But it is the effects of testosterone she sees.

The nice guy sometimes is not strong or powerful and that's what turns women off. So in essence, it's not the fact that they are nice, it's that they may be lacking other attractive qualities that out weigh the niceness.

Which the Nice Guys do NOT have or are afraid of (and sterilize themselves with 'nice' philosophies).

Ultimately, I love nice guys that illuminate strength and masculinity. There is no better combination.

It becomes quite simple:

NICE GUY: Male who is scared of his testosterone and seeks to sterilize himself with his niceness.

JERK: A male who merely acts male. He is controlled by his testosterone. This is why he gets into trouble.

GREAT GUY: A guy who can CONTROL his sexuality and acts male WITHOUT getting into trouble.

Sixth Girl

I got the e-mail about the nice guys vs. jerks. I'm totally for nice guys in a relationship, but when it comes to lusting or dreaming about a guy, it's usually the jerks, b/c most jerks have the nice bodies and have that something that's sexy about them.

Can you not see the pattern emerging? Are we not seeing the Jerk and Nice Guy for what they truly are?

Seventh Girl

I recognized some time ago exactly what I was doing... I was looking for a specific "character," for lack of a better
word. It's epitomized by Judd Nelson in "The Breakfast Club," or by Elvis Presley in "King Creole" for your readers who aren't up on the 80's John Hughes phenomenon. Essentially, they're "bad boys with heart." I've dated guys who are nice - JUST nice, and I get bored after about three dates. "Bad boys" are much more interesting, of course, although it's not a wish of women that these guys are REALLY bad. Misunderstood would be a better word.

Check out the local oldies station for "Leader of the Pack" and you'll get the idea. A guy who's a troublemaker enough to be dangerous and daring and fun and keep life interesting, but who is a real sweetheart underneath. Hell, even when I was in 8th grade, I was much more infatuated with Jason Bateman's character on Silver Spoons (the best friend/next door neighbor who was always causing trouble to get attention from parents he thought didn't care) than Ricky Schroeder's... Ricky was so sweet he was saccharine.

The problem that I've run into, as I'm sure many women have, is that most of these "bad boys" don't seem to have the good hearts we seek. What you see is what you get.

This is because they are CONTROLLED by it. The only way to get both, and be the desire of every woman, is to understand it and CONTROL it.

By the time you realize it, you may have been dating this jerk for a while. When you ditch him, it's "on with the search." For the same damned thing. This is where guys will get the idea that jerks get all the women. They see us in the process of the search. What they need to understand is that we're not looking for some nasty idiot; behind it all is the wish to find that guy who can be trouble to everyone else but nice to us. Just like Judd.

Eighth Girl

Nice guys vs. jerks isn't the real issue here, it is all about confidence. The major difference between nice guys and jerks is this: if a nice guy has the guts to approach a woman who has caught his attention, he is so worried about saying the perfect "nice" thing that he will totally flub it. The "nice" one ends up stumbling away from the object of his desires with his tail caught between his legs ... for those who don't already realize, this is NOT the impression you want to make!

A jerk, on the other hand, appears to have been blessed with ability to approach anyone and say just what's on his mind completely disregarding any of the repercussions. He just does it. I have no clue how he does it. But DAMN, the man who has the confidence to accomplish that has caught my eye for the night whether he wants it or not!

What does this say? She is saying: "Stop trying to say the perfect thing!" This was why I left 'Seduction' behind and gone the Natural route. It is more fun, less headaches, and gets better effects.

Ninth Girl

Don't think women don't like nice guys. There is an initial appeal to a jerk, but it doesn't last long. As long as you don't act desperate and have a little something going for you, believe me, a nice guy CAN finish first - and with the girl of his dreams.

Translated: Treat yourself as the PRIZE to be won.

This does solve a lot of errors but it is not enough. Mastering the secret of the jerk optimizes your sexual appeal.

Tenth Girl

This is from the book (which I am sure many of you have read) called The Fountainhead by Ayn Rand. Ms. Rand's Objectivism was always a bit thorny going down philosophically. (And I know how women are the sexual ones which is strange with the person of Ms. Rand. Yet, Ms. Rand's 'noble hero' is entirely in the sexual realm. Her heroes are her ideal men.)

Objectivism is, in Ms. Rand's words, a 'noble' vision of Man which characters like John Galt as symbols. But Objectivism is more of a style of masculinity than it is a philosophy. Her heroes usually blast philosophical 'niceness' away.

In The Fountainhead, the hero (Roark) is not attractive and said to be even ugly. His rival, (Keating), is the pretty boy. But notice the effect that Roark has on Dominque, the extroadinarily beautiful woman. At the quarry, he does not seduce her. He literally rapes her (as virgin girls are often said to express as fantasy).

At a later party, the people notice Dominque (usually surrounded by desperate guys) show signs of attraction.

"And, my dear," asked Kiki Holcombe, "what did you think of that new one, you know, I saw you talking to him, that Howard Roark?"

"I think," said Dominique firmly, "that he is the most revolting person I've ever met."

"Oh, now, really?"

"Do you care for that sort of unbridled arrogance? I don't know what one could say for him, unless it's that he's terribly
good-looking, if that matters."

"Good-looking!? Are you being funny, Dominique?"

The beautiful woman is attracted to this ugly guy. But why?

"Why, my dear," said kiki, "he's not good-looking at all, but extremely masculine."

Extreme masculinity. This is what the beautiful woman wants.

Now for the males:

First Male

One thing to add on the nice guys V jerks thing: jerks win because in their selfish insensitivity they never hide their raw sexuality. Nice guys in their sensitivity hide their sexuality because they think it will oppress women.

This guy is on the right track.

Women are powerfully attracted to guys who are open with their sexuality, thus the jerks win.

EXACTLY!

Now it is important to realize that being open with your sexuality is not about being a macho wanker, but simply about not denying that you wanna have sex with her. She knows it anyway, and if you don't let the world know it, you're headed right for the friendship zone, which is great if you wanna chat all night only to see her waltz out the door and straight into bed with some ******* who just walked in, but useless if you wanna be the one helping her mess up her sheets.

SO TRUE!

To be open with your sexuality all you gotta do is be yourself knowing that it is fine to feel sexual about her, just don't drool or go straight for the Wanna F**k approach (although even that works about 10% of the time).

When we acted on our desires as AFCS, we got burned. So many of us became desireless (which is not bad for getting the attention of many pretty babes). But male lust turns women on. The problem is not the male lust, it is putting that male lust in ridiculous philosophies such as the 'Nice Guy' way and so on. Realize that there are no ilosophies with dealing with Nature and trust your gut more.

Be nice by all means, in fact I would advocate nothing but niceness, but you gotta combine it with strength and let your sexuality shine through. After all, the difference between you and the jerk is that you are nice, he is sexual, but who does she take home???

Second Male

This is regarding the Nice guy-Jerk controversy. Just want to confirm some of the claims with first-hand experience.

Listen to this one. He describes why even ugly guys get the beautiful babes.

I'm 22, an Aerospace Graduate student and considered myself in the past to be a nice guy, and still a nice guy. Recently, I'm working weekends as a bouncer. (I'm a fully qualified Ju-Jitsu 1st Dan Black Belt, but getting some free sex on the side is part of my agenda too). The truth is I can't keep the women off me. I don't know how many numbers I'm gathering, cause I cant keep track. Why not before when I was a nice-guy and concerned for my female friends?

My reasoning is that the theory of Male Dominance/Machoness or jerkiness is in effect. One girl even spelled it out for me the other night at this club I was working. Her words were something to the effect of: "90% of girls would go out with you because you're the bouncer, but you're also really good looking and sweet," or something like this.

It is STRENGTH women are attracted to. But where does this strength come from? Why do guys love crushing their bodies in the gym or in sports? It is the testosterone.

Well, now that I think about it, she's right. I see fat, ugly, bouncers who just got out of jail picking up girls all the time, whereas they wouldn't stand a chance if they weren't bouncers.... why? Because they're "tough-guys."

And as we see, this also explains why UGLY guys get the beautiful girls. It has nothing to do with confidence; it has everything to do with testosterone. Some guys can be very confidant with debates, with presentations, etc. But get them in front of a woman and they freeze. Whereas some guys cannot do all the former but know EXACTLY what to do when around women.

In my case, I am both very polite and considerate (towards women and men, except on a bad day, when I don't give a f**k).

Seeing this it seems to turn them on. It's the mixed signal theory where women see that you're a 'tough guy' and a 'nice guy' at the same time - the classic Humphrey Bogart thing.

SO the bottom line is: Be tough (or if you're not, look tough and act tough). This isn't to say become a bouncer, because it is not only dangerous and risky, but also very foolish, and not worth it, unless you have the skill. Even then. Personally, I'm a bit of an adrenaline junkie, so I don't mind.

Another tip - flaunt the things you're good at or like to do, or your accomplishments. But don't lie, so that upon confrontation, you're open-jawed. (i.e. I'm a pilot, and I mention this to chicks I date because I love flying and it's a part of me. It's my only hobby. And it's something not all do and so is an attention getter.)

Hope this helps. We all have a lot to learn so don't worry, you'll get there if you try. It's a matter of educating yourself about these things. I believe and I'm far from it, but the 'real Don Juans' (like the movies) have learned many hard lessons and have keenly observed others and the mistakes they make. It's like Aviation. You don't want to be in the NTSB accident report. You want to read it and learn from other's mistakes. Good luck !!

Third Male

Well here is my two cents worth and it's going to piss off most of the chicks and a lot of wimpy men.

Wimpy men! That perfectly describes this guys who are scared of their sexuality, of the effects their testosterone might have on them.

Girls do like jerks, especially the pretty girls (fair or not you fellows know the pretty ones are the ones we want).

PRECISELY!

And these girls can have anyone they want, so they deserve no sympathy when they get treated like dirt. Ladies, please spare me the fecal matter about how you don't know he is a jerk. Guys if you are a shoulder to cry on for these women you are a bunch of damn fools.

Yes!

What I really get tired of hearing is that when women get older they become more attracted to nice guys. This is true only if she has gained 100lbs,has finally divorced the jerk, and has a couple of his kids she needs some sucker to help support.

Exactly!

Even then she will secretly always want him back. It happens to me constantly, and these chicks can go to hell as far as I'm concerned.

It is not that Nice Guys finish last. It is that Nice Guys, when it comes to the woman's lust, do not win at all.

The best seducer I know personally is an alcoholic, ex-convict, pathological liar with a violent temper, who can't hold down a job.

And yet some of you guys are reading seduction material until your eyes hurt! As the scientist said above, high rates of testosterone are found in criminals, in gigantic liars, and such.

Hell, look at how popular Bill Clinton is with women voters. This is why I'm primarily interested in financial success.

To hell with these dumb chicks. Let them marry a turd and live in misery. I'm going to have a nice home, car, and retire comfortably.

Heh. At least he knows what he wants.

If you're nice, she thinks you are a puss, chump and not a real man. It's always been this way and always will be.

Actors, pro athletes, rock stars, and drug dealers are always awash with women, and these guys are known scum.

These guys are also the ones who are rated with the highest testosterone levels. This is the jerk's secret and he doesn't even realize it.

Fourth Male

This male we all know. His name is Jake Steed:

Here are some examples for you. I have a co-worker and friend who is one of the best natural seductionists I've ever met.

He has fvcked more women than any of the guys here could dream of. Yes, he parties, and yes he seduces.

Yes! We all have met them.

He just so happens to be the most brilliant, accomplished person of his position in the company. So how about your theory that seduction "swallows" you up? Don't be rediculous. LIFE is about balance.

And yes! Jake illustrates my point here. The answer is because he does not 'seduce'. He is natural man. Highly testosteronized males, especially if they can control it, rise far in the businessworld.

The difference between Apollonian and Dionysian at its ROOT LEVEL is that Apollonian CONTROLS Nature while Dionysian is CONTROLLED by it. Apollonian is not to cast Nature out to the netherworld or to be a killjoy.

I'll take my example a bit further. I actually showed him this website, and you know what he did? He laughed his ass off.

He couldn't understand how guys like the guys here could devote so much time and energy into discussing women. He doesn't even THINK about what he does. He just does.

THANK YOU JAKE! I have been saying this on and on and on. In the 'Kill the Desperation' thread, when asked about my 'philosophy', I said there was none and you guys got confused. Later, when I said to stop treating love and sexuality like an academic degree (studying books and websites on the subject), you guys got mad at me.

This isn't rocket science, it is women. And the answers are already embedded in your nature.

So where does that leave YOU? This guy is building an amazing career AND fvcking tons and tons of hot ass women--while you and I are here discussing the fvcking path of Apollo VS the path of Dionysis and some guy named Pook who has risen to godlike status on some little known message board. So just WHO's on the Apollo path here?

Don't confuse Apollonian with career success.

Later, RDToo adds:

The thing that is never addressed is the quality of women that you want to get with. I would bet that Ross Jefferies has never had a real quality woman. Women are not as dumb as alot of guys here seem to think, and they learn from experience as well as we do. I know a very quality woman who shoots down all seduction attempts. She says the thing that attracts her is the "quality of character" in a man. I do not think that learning SS is building that kind of characters.

THANK YOU RDTOO! Speed Seduction cannot build character because the focus is (let us say it together): ENTIRELY ON THE
WOMAN.

Gentlemen, when you want beautiful women you are in the big leagues. SS is more concerned with quantity than quality. This
was why I left it behind.

To INCREASE testosterone

No, do not run out and get shots. In our modern world cubicles and style, we are at desks and usually not in a state of action. But there are some easy ways to increase one's testosterone naturally and have the effects of:

-Greater Confidence

-Action

-Boldness

-Strength

No more analyzing

Turn OFF your computer and stop reading and rereading seduction knowledge. The only true benifet of the seduction material was not in the HOWs of getting seduction, it was opening your eyes of how Nature actually works. When I was a Nice Guy and read Tony's Get Laid Guy, it did a number on my head. It smashed all my nice guy 'philosophies'.

Build up the Body

Oddly, working out does seem to have more psychological effects then physical ones. Jerks always usally have nice bodies. Keep in the state of action.

Several of the guys in the 'health and fitness' forum we never hear from in the other forums. WHY? Because they know they don't need philosophies.

Listen to Anthony Ellis of the skinnyguy.net who says:

You have to have that drive and determination, and the change has to come from within. All the exterior things they don't mean much. You want to change the way you see life. You want to change your relationships. You want to make your workplace better. You want to be happier.

But Mr. Ellis, who went from scrawny guy to impressive muscle guy, I have noticed people who discovered that when they can change their bodies, they can change their whole lives. Did you notice that?

I'm definitely more confident. I believe in myself a lot more. I feel I can do other things I would never have thought to do before. I'm not afraid to be out at night, and that's a big deal for me. I enjoy the city so much more. I'm a part of it now.

And doing this is not brain surgery; I didn't save someone's life. But I improved my life, which is very difficult to do.

How many people are trying to lose fat? How many are trying to gain muscle? How many people are trying to get control of their lives? I have, and I feel empowered. I have no doubt any direction I choose to take my life will be successful.

You've kept this up for about a year now. You've got the solid muscle mass, a great physique, a great outlook, but what does long-term success mean to you? Is this going to be part of it?

This is definitely part of my life now. It's a permanent fixture. I may make slight adjustments, but once you go on this trip, there's no return ticket. You don't want to go back. It's like going to Hawaii. You don't want to come back because you have seen the other side. Once you get going, once you get the momentum going, once you start looking better, once you start feeling better, you don't want to stop. You want to keep exercising, to keep looking good and feeling good.

What do you tell people who don't believe this is possible?

When I meet people with that type of attitude people who say, "That's not possible" I tell them, "For you it's not possible because you don't believe it. If you don't believe you can do it, you can't."

I think they need to believe it before it will work for them. When they open their minds, things are going to start happening. Doors are going to start opening. They see the reality of the situation.

It's absolutely 100% necessary to believe you can do it. I mean really believe it deep down inside.

I've come to realize that most of what happens to you is a result of you. It all comes from inside. Everything you do, everything you are, how you handle everything that happens to you is your responsibility. So if you want to change, look inside. When you decide to change from the inside, the outside will fall into place.

For as you think, you shall become. This is why the focus must always remain ON YOU.

Some other things:

Joining a Sport

Every male needs good 'ol competition. Ever notice why the 'jocks' get the girls? Perhaps its because their testosterone levels shoot up or at least appear to?

Eating More

For skinny guys, this is a must. It strengthens the body.

Don't take yourself so seriously

This is for the shy and hesitant guys. You need to get over the fact that the world does not revolve around you. It never has and never will. No one will care if you hit on a chick. No one will care if you make a move on her. Do not rationalize away your desires.

Start doing some of the things the 'awful' jerks do.

Try getting on stage and being some rock star. Your testosterone levels will shoot up. Try acting. Since projection is all, your levels of testosterone will rise. Women will naturally sense it (and also because it will spring off other actions).

A New Start

Let us consider the Nice Guy vs. Jerk debate to be over. The Nice Guy is a male who is afraid or doesn't embrace his
testosterone. The Jerk should be seen as the Testosteronized Male.

What we understand, we have power to use. What we do not understand, it has power to use us.

For we possess the ability to restart our lives over again. Be not scared (by acting nice or relying on mental tricks) to do what your testosterone was put there to make you do.

Be natural = Be Man

"

Cliff's list - How to own the bars and nightclubs in your town - Dr Alex Benzer

2005-10-22T16:14:00.000-04:00

"Hey guys. To those of you who attended the Cliff's List Seminar,
I'd like to thank you all for your positive feedback. It means more
than you know. Also would like to thank Cliff for his
organizational prowess and remarkable ability to bring together in
one place so many different people of varying viewpoints.
Now people have been asking me about this topic for a while, and I
finally got around to writing it up.
Back when I lived in Boston and used to go to bars and clubs with
some regularity, it seemed as if I knew every bouncer and bartender
in town. I never had to wait in line, and often when I'd arrive at
the bar, the bartender would already have my favorite drink ready
for me and refuse to take my money. Your town may be bigger or
smaller than Boston, but the principles that I used are applicable
anywhere.
The key principle here is to get to know the staff and treat them
exceptionally well. Since you're already a nice guy, this should
not be a stretch. Treating people well does not mean giving them
huge tips all the time in fact, I recommend against that. It means
imagining that this person is like a close friend or family member
(one that you like, preferably), and treating them accordingly.
Here's what you do:
- Show up to venues early or on off days. This is when the
establishment isn't too busy, and you can chat with the bouncers
and bartenders at ease. Make the staff laugh, entertain them, ask
them about their lives. The work is deadly boring when there's no
one around, so they will appreciate the company. You are making a
bond with them as a person, not as a customer. So guess whom they
will pull out of line and send inside next time fifty people are
waiting to get in? In all the years that I have skipped the line at
a club or bar in my hometown, I have never tipped the bouncer,
because you don't have to tip your friends to be nice to you.
- If you like to tip bouncers, do it once and do it after you've
already gotten in or on your way out. Why? Because if you tip them
before you get in, you're begging or bribing. Whereas if you tip
him after you've already gotten in or on your way out, you are
rewarding and appreciating. Which gesture conveys more class the
bribe or the present? Which kind of person would you value more? If
there's more than one bouncer, you may have to tip each one
individually. Think of it as a single investment that pays off
dividends over time.
- Instead of tipping bouncers and bartenders, consider giving them
little presents. Why? Because friends give each other gifts, not
money. I had a habit of carrying some very high-quality nugget-size
Italian chocolate with me whenever I went out, and I'd give one to
the bouncer on my way into the club (regardless of whether there
was a line or not) or leave it on top of my tip after getting a
drink. Take it from me: this makes you stand out from the crowd in
a big way, and chances are the staff will never forget you. In
fact, they will go out of their way to be nice to you.
- Remember everyone's name, and make sure they know yours. If you
can know their last names, even better. While every other punter in
the bar is an anonymous potential problem, you are that cool guy
Jeff that every staff member likes. When a bartender calls you by
name (especially if she's an att(ractive woman herself), all the
other women will sit up and pay attention, wondering who you are.
You have immediate social proof, which can only help you.
- Finally, bring a lot of positive energy to your interactions with
the staff members. If you're upbeat and fun and happy and making
everyone laugh and generally making their day better, they will
remember you and they will appreciate you for it, even if you don't
do any of the other things I mentioned. This is by far the most
important of the five tips.
If you do all or even just some of these things,miracles will
follow. Long lines will vanish for you, f(ree drinks will
materialize for you out of nowhere, nobody will harass you to leave
the establishment, even after the chairs are up and they're mopping
the floor, and you will be invited to staff after parties with no
effort of your own. Why? Because you are now a friend of the
establishment, and friends do nice things for each other. That's
why they're called friends, buddy.
Speaking of friends, would be nice to hear from y'all. If you have
a specific question or just want to say hi, shoot me an email at
dralex@thetaoofdating.com.
"

Hear me whine

2005-10-21T17:48:00.000-04:00

Constantly, just add my rss feed to your rss client, if you have firefox it's the little orange box in the bottom right corner, or google desktop has one too, not sure about IE, mail applications have em too.

Really cool tech. people can read your blog without having to go to it, and if they see an interesting article you can click on it and get to the blog to comment or what not!

Pathological idiocy

2005-10-20T11:40:00.000-04:00

(this article does not talk about pathological idiocy, the title was bait to get you in here reading this. If you would like to know more about pathological idiocy, Darwin Awards should help you out)

One more major exam to go! and then party time for a week...

Oh btw, got a blog? are most of your viewers TECH buyers and stuff? or do you simply have a LOT of VIEWERS?

whatever it is, i've been making crazy cash from page impressions (people just VIEWING my page) using CHITIKA.

It's like having a job, except all i do is write articles now and then for you guys to come check my page out, and of course i do aim to entertain the reader, or at least occupy him or inform him on something.

But definetly if you'd like to cash in a bit on your paypal using your BLOG
check out CHITIKA.

Learn from errors! Don't repeat them

2005-10-18T15:27:00.000-04:00

If you read my earlier posts you will notice most of them talk about my failures concerning situations of seduction i've been confronted with.

I write them here so i can re-read them and think of HOW it actually SHOULD have happened, so that i can apply the new found method the next time a similar situation comes up.

Of course life is all about being spontaneous, and REACTING naturally, but people normally learn from their parents how they should live; i'll cf. Oedious complexe: son wants to marry his mom so he acts like his dad and tries to do whatever he does better, same goes for daughter but in reverse.

I and i'm sure a lot of AFC's out there (average frustrated chumps) probabily had problems in this developmental stage because of lack of education or what not.

Freud postulates too that if you grow up in a household where you get starred at (symbolically) for talking about any mildly sexual topic, and where it is over-tabooed to talk about these things, then you have difficulty expressing yourself concerning these things too.

Looks i fit in both groups so like i said i've written articles in the bottom concerning a lot of my mistakes and i hope to help myself by trashing it here and revisualizing the situation.

Go right ahead if you have seduction comments, just as well as TECH.

UAI

2005-10-10T21:03:00.000-04:00

As midterm exam approaches i will have to layback from blogging for a couple of weeks, but i do intend to use my week off to start a new project that is lagging behind since quite a while.

That project is to make a Useful Artificial Intelligence application (UAI) such as a room music system that is turned on by voice commands, and is responsive, a security webcam app, and a bunch of other automated stuff.

If you have any idea of what other automated stuff i could make, please leave a comment.

ps: i know all this is readily available on the web, i am just making one myself.

Note

2005-10-01T22:45:00.000-04:00

A lot of the articles you should be seing here are saved as blog so that i can improve them, i have unfortunately been unable to compose a highly competent article in these past few months so i will
keep the following in draft as long as it takes.

A lot of shit that i don't needis happening around me too, so i have to deal with it before i can write on it.

Relations have to be rethunk.
People have to be met.
Others have to be eliminated.

And it's harder than you'd think, an effort does have to be made to cut a thick link.

Who am i?

2005-07-06T17:51:00.000-04:00

So many cultures. What's a culture? Whose a culture?

This is not a rebellious impulsion of mine... but in this modern world everyone wants to be unique, yet there is always someone playing a predefined role in a certain group, everywhere across the world.

I WANNA WRITE A WITTY NOVEL! ME ME ME! ME.
MEMEMEME.
i wanna be EGOCENTRIC!
YES ME>
>ME.

(this blog was a short crisis in time of inspirational drought)

Too much free time!

2005-06-29T15:05:00.000-04:00

Has rendered me unable to post anything here.
Between the goodbyez, adminz, listening to parental bsz, and getting stuff readyz for tripz.

A couple personal *chats* i've had with random ppl come up here but become irrelevant after a real short two days with my aunt and cousin near paris!

Easily *visibly* amazed doesnt fit into my personal description, but here's a big WOW.

The people are so open, randomly talkative, and just COOL it's fucking great.

Feelz like imma learn a lot here.

useful stuff too.

Fucked up things happen in even years.

2005-06-22T09:50:00.000-04:00

I get bronze @ the science fair, i get top half 90 grades and beat a "Math Genius" in class, in several courses (fortunately for him, every year was an even year for him seeing he's at waterloo now)... i get accepted in IBO, i code a very innovative multithreaded stealthy portsniffing gadget, that works hand in hand with a windows batch script, it's the first of it's kind (sniffing thingy), and i (we) own over 20K computers in a matter of weeks.
And now i cant stick around for more than 30 min watching a guy code prodigiously, or pass a course.

Odd things happen in odd years.

2005-06-22T09:46:00.000-04:00

Here's a brief summary of years when for me things couldnt go more wrong:

1999 Big surgery, failed math class (13%) , I start being rejected in calgary.

2001 Big move, big failures, big things happen too fast.

2003 Big car accident, broken femur, I fail my school year.

2005 Get mugged, fail my school year, get one whole semester cancelled by administration.

i'd list the earlier things but i cant remember them yet...

1986+2N+1
integer N>0

Shot down!

2005-06-21T18:16:00.000-04:00

You're at war in WWI, and you get shot once while running from trench to trench. What do you do?
You get shot again.
What do you do then?
Once more.
And on it goes.
You can't really run back because you'll get shot another time.
Just like a car that's running out of gas in an isolated desert, your trip is one way!

my Last Shot

2005-06-17T13:23:00.000-04:00

Look back into your past, you can see yourself at the top at times when you felt like there was no end to the bottom. These times when you felt the only way you could fall any lower on the scale of whatever, was by bouncing back up.

Thankfully you convinced yourself things were ok, or good... if not at their best.

In retrospect it looks pretty damn good now, you never felt down, you never were down... you don't remember. Definetly you've always been on top.

To those that complain about your lack of realism, they have always been lower. You're a human being if you can read this; you've got eyes and a brain to interpret this. You live a life that is how you choose it to be.

But when you get to the bottom you often drag the fabric of family, friends, and at times society down with you. Sort of like a bowling ball on a mattress sheet smoothly curves the sheet around it and however well you succeed in pushing yourself back up, those you've dragged down hold their position and keep the sheet lower, this hence makes you fall back down with them.

Another evil circle.
Just life.
chain reactions...
Your close ones. Society.

Try giving it your all, blinding yourself and forgetting the drag or the pull down towards the bottom, just keep on going full speed. You need to convince yourself you're aiming to the sky. Only then do you have a merely existant chance of rising higher.

My prozac!

2005-06-16T14:00:00.000-04:00

I rarely feel down, but FUCK.

I Just read over several past posts from this blog, oh..my, GOD. It made me feel so good this is crazy.

I LOVE MYSELF!

Hard time

2005-06-16T13:35:00.000-04:00

The two vicious circles of life: that of success, that of failure.

Always two choices. Too bad that coin in your head is rigged.

Pushing and shoving.

2005-06-14T11:01:00.000-04:00

People take great joy from *feeling better*, but to feel better you had to feel bad at some point.
What better way to feel bad then to get beat up, and then rejoyce from feeling no more pain after a period of healing; that might be why Man loves to fight. When you win a fight you prove you've got more meat around your bones than the other guy too, and that usually means you need more space to breathe and you're taking over his territory.

The thing is people don't think, so this shit is all irrelevant, people fight out of lust, hate, and other *emotions and shit*.

Then there's just fighting to discover what fighting is.

Back in halifax after a long day out at school, i arrange a fight with this one guy. Ya, used to be you have to check your schedule to get facial reconstruction the old school way. When the time comes for the fight, it's a lot of bs, each of us trying to piss the other one off without lacking respect and shit. It was dumb but hell, it was that. I mean without hesitation i'd beat my sister with a chair back then, and i have (as a youth... but when you consider she then scratched my face off) But this guy was just a *friend* and he didn't live with me 24/7. So once the fight gets started i throw him around, there's a lot of senseless pushing, i throw him on a car parked next by, he jumps back up grabs my head and succeeds in getting me down then bangs my head repetitively on the concrete edge of the sidewalk, then the roles inverse it's my turn, and so it goes on for a good little while.

Then we get tired, shake hands, see each other the next day.

I didn't get laid that night, when i think of it, i don't know if i could have 8-).

Good ol'

2005-06-12T13:00:00.000-04:00

Sometimes i get these flashbacks of things that happened in my life in moments when i was confused or lost. When i lived back in Calgary going to Junior High i was still straightening my sort of *hyperactive* indifference i'd been gifted with in my earlier days. I still did dumb stuff, but much less, and i was the big loser in most of the cases.

Bored at lunch i decide to walk out and look for one of my "friends", a sorta lost cowboy kid that was pretty relax! And brought up in a wrecked household, just like you see'em in the movies (parental disturbances etc.). I find him throwing stuff onto the backwall of the school, walking up to him i notice he has a carton box from which he is pulling out long cylindrical *brassy* ink-cartridge like objects. Once i get close enough to ask him about these he mentions how throwing them hard enough on the wall would make them exploded and launch back somewhere. Yep, i just now (as in now now.) get the idea of calling this the calgarian roulette without any roulettes, and smaller chances of getting shot.

Shotgun shells are pretty fun to play with when you enjoy fear, or are *dumb* enough to not know what can happen with a shaken and thrown around shotgun shell.

The funny part is once the word gets out that we're playing calgarian roulette on the back wall of the school at lunch, we've got to hide the evidence. Another genius idea comes up: let's flush them down the toilets!

Quite a splashy firework, too bad i wasnt there to witness it.

But i still got the shit from the principal because someone told someone else that i somehow was somewhat involved.

Poor innocent puppy eyed slim :-( .

The kid was so cool, i don't know what happened to him after actually, maybe another flashback will tell me.

What i do remember about him was how for halloween i dressed up in a 3 piece suit and him in a woman then we walked around and ALL THE TEENS serving candy at the door LOVED US. Shit we could've fucked one of em drunken late teen ager by being that cute. I mean imagine a big tall mob-boss look alike (that was the point of the three piece) and a whore! BOTH 12-13 YEARS OF AGE. Irresistible.

Of course the cliché costumes of the other kids were really well worked on too so we were in the higher averages instead of being atop. Point is we kicked ass.

Clear

2005-06-09T02:14:00.000-04:00

My mind feels so blank; not confused, yet not sure either.

i need a break...

Stop thinking a bit guy.

Don't count your chickens before they're hatched

2005-06-05T22:07:00.000-04:00

That was a classic.

I'm not deceived because as i said in the previous post, i felt no immediate interest, neither did i do any work. But ya we were fucked in the end; the numbers were random.

As i predicted, the *moves* made by me buddy were damn *bad*. At least he tried. That's the most important part of it.

Dead cold.

2005-06-05T09:32:00.000-04:00

Walking up st. catherine with me buddy yac' we got picked up by a groupoid of chicks!

...i said i'd write *fictional content with successful pick up stories* from now on but this is FACTUAL.

That street is fucking full during the summer @ night on saturday. Full of tourists, hot babes, hot horny babes, and more of all kinds of babes. Our success rate strictly speaking was null before this, not that we didnt attract girls a lot (i can recollect about 5-6 times when chicks made me understand they're open for my action by SPEAKING to me, and my buddies each have their own count). But we were lazy and scared mofo's not able to think up anything to answer. This time, the chicks jumped out in front of us as we were walking up, and asked "C'est qui la plus belle!!!?" i then just proceded on giving a lil smile and continuing to walk, my buddy initially followed me, then the chicks insisted, noticed i wasnt interested so focused on my buddy who answered *honestly* (BAD MOVE) to that question.

I made a remark on their shirt and they tried to keep conversation live, then my buddy asked for one's telephone. That girl whose phone he got told me to get her buddies hahahaha. I then follow orders, take the number of the bigbreasted, nice legged blond babe.

She then tried to make some remarks about her name, and how it fit her well *isabelle*.

Well well well. no idea what comes next!
To call or not to call.
To fuck or not to fuck.

Responsibility

2005-05-30T00:07:00.000-04:00

Someone asks you for directions and you have an approximate idea of what they're looking for:

a) Do you bother decrypting their question, understanding what it is they want. Doing this of course all the while thinking it's by pure respect for human communication.

b) Do you just answer "No fucking clue" and go on with YOUR precious life.

c) Do you ask what it is exactly they're looking for.

d) You have don't bother decrypting their question, and still try to answer it. Mumbling, phumbling, whateverbling.

e) You answer randomly with confidence, or try to change the subject.

You're an average guy, the answer is mostly c). I'm mostly d). But i envy a), b) and c) maybe e) too.

I'll skip the basics and go straight to the point: i'm a lasy, traumatised piece of ass; i'll never get anything done with my life. Sad thing being this is all new. And i hate recomforting myself, so yes. This is all new. I wish i'd been born that way but i was ambitous and a risk taker at once, it might have been in an imaginary world of infancy, or not; either way i should've continued like that straight through adulthood. I jumped off road, i'm slipping but it feels like i've got a grip and i'll soon be back in the right direction.

You have just read everybody's diary in a single paragraph. You can modify it SO slightly to apply to you, just don't be surprised.

Uncensored.

2005-05-29T23:40:00.000-04:00

And if you show me one example of a human being that lives without seeking power, i'd want to know him better. That may even be the purpose of me writing here; i'm doing it to meet the little guy inside me that never talks, but that I do idolise.

He doesn't crave power, and as a consequence of that has it!

I'd do anything he'll tell me to do. Anything.

No, no... he's not a ghastly humanoid-shaped buddy. Neither does he resonate inside my skull, but he sure has a say in more and more of what i do. I regret his existence at time, but i always justify his actions. He's always right because wrong does not exist for him. Wrong does not belong to his field of reach, of knowledge.

Taming it did take a long time, ans accepting it's presence now is great. Living with it is wonderful, but it'll sometimes say too much. It has no feelings, and pulls you to this lonely cave once you've met it.

It's God-like?

A bit of serious.

2005-05-24T23:14:00.000-04:00

Misery you are so powerful, why are you selective?
I get it; Diversity! you are to blame.

Diversity you are so great, variety, difference, asymetry, chaos, CHANGE.
Evolution... I will live if i have the greatest power. I develop a mind!

What do i want?

Life and power with a mind. Have i failed to obtain it?
Misery and death awaits me.

Life and happiness. Could i fail to obtain it?
I'll have a glass of joy as long as i keep a mutable mind!

Life is therefore an inevitable SUCCESS.

Usefulness

2005-05-22T03:31:00.000-04:00

To make this blog useful from now on here are the rules concerning personal failure stories.

All failure stories must include
1. A real, or if the real thing isn't good then a fictional but realistic conversation.
2. They must be original and not too bold.
3. They must fit into the "slim" -style of talking and living life, such that slim would and could have easily adapted the script to the real life situation.

More rules when this evolves.

This is not good for me.

2005-05-22T03:21:00.000-04:00

Two fresh stories from the crypt.

First one:
Clubbing, slim gets tired, slim looks for a empty space near the wall to hang and rest, slim goes rest, shorty comes to rest next to slim, slim stays for the rest, guy comes towards the chick that is next to slim, slim fends the guy away by stretching and staring at the guy, a second guy does the same thing, slim reacts identically, slim keeps on resting, chick vanishes.

Number 2:
Star Wars III, revenge of the sith, after the movie, slim leaves the guys to go wait for his bus in front of a Telus store, slim relaxes on wall, it's rainy, and cold, people walk by continuously for a dozen minutes, some buisnessmen ask slim where "Dun's" is, slim doesn't know, slim lays back on the wall, relaxed, a car stops at the red light with what appears to be two blond females, slim stares at them in order to allow his slow eyes to focus on the females, and assess the situation, in the mean time the chicks say "Hi!", slim responds with "hey" not very loud, the females dont hear and say to each other "he doesn't understand hi", slim repeats "Hey, wassup" and salutes them. They apparently smile then due to slim's inactivity leave once the light has turned green.

Aevumdynamics

2005-05-20T18:24:00.000-04:00

Wounds, oh wounds, ooooh wounds.

Pain, it's painful, they're painful, they were painful.

Do we learn from being hirt, what is gained from this pain. I don't think anything is gained from a wound that still inflicts pain, only from one that does not inflict pain, because only then will we be able to understand it. Because by not feeling it we unconsciously rationalised it as not being hirtful, and we can only do so once we've understood it, therefore the problem is resolved naturally. Once that is, we have learnt, only then. Many children despise school because it is too much work, and it is hard. But most that end up succeedingtend to have rationalised it as not so bad and they manage to enjoy it in the end, while it lasts.

It's no use gaining respect from wounds that still kill us, it is once we can control them and gain more than is lost to pain. Once we understand that, we also see that life fits perfectly under the definition of a succession of non-painful wounds, and that we therefore learn from it, and only it.

The truly simple life - Joy sequel

2005-05-19T17:00:00.000-04:00

Depressive people are bad.

Life is but a series of very short events; Event's that are either happy events, or sad events. The feeling associated to those event's is completely controlled by us; only nature can afflict sadness upon us. When it does, we have to tell ourselves this moment is very short, and that we might as well laugh it off hoping to catch the next train of happiness. It's pathetic to live a sadlife; even sadists take pleasure from feeling pain, in the end they'll be happy..ya whatever you do in life, your goal is probably recompensating in a pleasureful manner. And if nature tries to bring you down it can only be good to ignore it convincing yourself that it's only a SHORT instant.

Hence, i fail to understand depressive's, and i despise those that are so to a point where it is contagious. Just be happy with your life, be happy for those around you, and be happy. Live your life normally otherwise.

Joy

2005-05-19T00:49:00.000-04:00

Life's too short to be unhappy. Unhappiness originates from confusion! yes. How can you be unhappy when you fully understand everything that's going on? it would be sadistic to inflict nonpleasureful feelings upon yourself.

Good clean happiness is the purest of attainable goodies nature can provide us, we might as well be happy all the time. Regardless of the situation, or other people's attempts to affect us.

Ya man attitude

2005-05-17T20:47:00.001-04:00

After applying the croBadboy attitude at my neighbours while fixing up her pc, it felt so less tense than usual.

Just being relaxed and applying rapport immediately: she's a proff. => interests in her field of work.

Read between the lines

2005-05-17T19:17:00.000-04:00

Day near the pharmacy:

Have a coffee.
In a secluded area of a mall.
Have a seat.
Wait for 2 females to randomly decide to walk towards your secluded area to have a seat and drink their whatever..
See one of them pick the table right next to you and stop while her friend is looking at you while you look back.
Have a good giggle when you see her friend hump her because she's distracted looking at you!

Be proud you are you and therefore you reacted as you normally do.

Firecat

2005-05-15T00:43:00.000-04:00

Complexity through humanity.
Humanity through society.
Society through confused communication.
Confused communication through MSN.

Clarity through simplicity.
Wisdom through clarity.

MSN is the antichrist, and that's not just because of the M part. Addictive chat protocols are those that are too widely distributed, distributed so much that it beats even telephone networks. It's plain bad.

Humans live with addictions, it's a human trait. I'd blog on the human soul but not right here, not right now.

Feel good

2005-05-14T01:38:00.000-04:00

I get it now.

It's all clear, and i want this thought to stay in my mind; it's all a question of feeling you have no dues! Once that happens, you'll be living without the hastle of living your life proxied through your obsessive thought! You'll just live it as it comes and goes... It's all a matter of feeling like you owe no one anything.

The problem now at hand is why does it feel like your owing everyone something, when you are absolutely not.

Hahahaha failure you are!

2005-05-12T19:05:00.000-04:00

SHOCK.
ME.

Note to self:
Coffee is bad.

On my bus ride back i fall upon a blonde polish sex-bomb / slut!
Oh, My, God. What the hell happened to me? Nothing you're just an average idiotique piece of shit especially in social situations.

I got into a brief discussion, but oh well i guess it was tougher to straighten up after how you freaked her out when she saw you at the bar. So if you want to take up an always classy nice guy attitude: Have it ALL THE TIME.

Failure i'm not.

2005-05-12T12:09:00.000-04:00

There's way, way, way way, way, way way waaaaaaay too much snow in this country. Like wtf i'm waiting for my bus it's freezing cold there's a meter of snow, and the bus is late!

Well well, well. That's when a very random French girl asks me whether i've checked bus times. I answer then freeze my balls a bit longer.

There's probably a direct link between the testicles and the brain in males. Or indirect, i should say to be precise; the hormonal shitz0rz. But i'm talking about a stimulating link between frozen balls and social abilities, cause right after that and a lot of waiting, i remember turning back, and there she was starring right besides me or at me, just looking around. So i do the most random thing ever, or at least on this blog maybe so far, on my part. I TALK TO HER.

> "Ils prenent leurs temps ici les bus...mais bon avec la neige"
< "oue, c'est vrais quand meme on attend depuis 30 min."

AND RANDOMLY once more. i continue the conversation.

> "oue, ...tu viens de france?"
< "oui"
> "hehe oue c'est ton accent, ya pas d'neige comme ca la bas"
< "pas vraiment a Paris"

(brief silence)

< "Tu es de france aussi?"
> "Non j'suis algerien, mais j'ai vecu en france assez"
< "Ah oue? c'est difficile pour les algeriens en france"
> "Ah bon?"
< "hih, peut etre pas trop pour toi"
> "Pourquoi?"
< "bah tu ressembles pas trop"
> "haha? vraiment?"

etc... a short talk on that, then in my head i tell myself the more i get her to talk about her life, the more she will think i'm interested. BAD MOVE. I learnt, and only recently, that it's bad to talk about work/school etc. unless they're completely crazy about that shit.

> "Sinon tu fais quoi?"
< "Etudiantes en anthropologie et toi?"
> "EUH CMF"

I did push it on the anthropology, we talked about it for like 4-5 minutes, i did so, retardedly thinking it would make her feel like i was really interested. But it's dumb, she doesnt care if i'm interested in what she does, she might care if i'm interested in HER. (note to self) Do not confuse those two.

She was pretty old relative to me then, i must have been 16-17, she seemed to be around 20.

> "Oue en fait j'suis en premiere, mais j'ai fait plein d'ecole et de truc et avec le changement... (insert boring long blabber about my education life here) ... et alors me voila en premiere"
< "Ah..ok, donc ils ont fais des fautes? t'es plus vieux en faite"
> "Bah c a d, moue"

During the whole conversation she has no idea of my age.
It felt like she lost interest in continuing this conversation about now. And on the moment i was telling myself how dumb a move it was to be hesitant regarding the age-wise question, so anyways we switch bus together but she stops one early to go to class.

Honestly i felt so good, and i had like no motivation to show this off. Maybe because i didn't hang out with those people who it'd have been funny to show off too. I think i was hanging out mostly with bj and m. Or maybe because it just felt completely normal for some absurd reason.

And when i did get motivation to speak, it was right after a friend of mine had fabulated some story TOO identical to this one. So in the end no one believed me but do i really care? I guess i got the feel for the playing field in this one, but something happened past this event that screwed my mental stability up.

This was before my coma.

Ladies and gentlemen

2005-05-12T10:31:00.000-04:00

SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX

I really dont care about sex; those who care enough to know me best for who i am and not for who they desire me to be for their personal selfworth, will know I can talk casually about normal sexual intercourse just as well as casual throat slitting, or old school "cut-the penis" style castration. As well as many other far-fetched scatologies.

Sex might be great but don't tell me it's not overpriced.

SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX

Something great is just feeling great about your life, regardless of how shitty it might be. Exs cant beat that. It never will; we've evolved into pure minds, the physical aspects of life are feeble in comparison.

Quadrity

2005-05-12T00:19:00.000-04:00

Nothing special happened.

First wish: I'd like to be relax all the time! YES the all natural slim! He who is so great... but how?

Drugs? no.
Alcohol? uhh.. no.
Reading? too late you illeterate duby.
TV? Bollywood.
Movies? Le proutch.

Just stop thinking for a second, have a goal clearly printed in your mind, go about accomplishing that goal, and whatever happens in the mean time you will react to as though your brain was empty and you only had that goal in your mind for the moment. If there is no goal, or you have trouble setting your goal, then the situation is not so great for you yet. Just try understanding why the idea of that goal came into your mind, and work with that to make a goal.

Does anyone know that song?

2005-05-11T11:18:00.000-04:00

Tata tatata, ta ta tatat, tata, ta ta, ta, ta, ta, ta.
tat tatatatatah. ehm BO!.
ta ta tatata.

i have it in my head
and fuck.
Can't name it, it's french, i think it's henry salvador singing or something.
Owns.

It's a beautiful sunny, warm day, and i haven't finished reading over the shit we're doing today.

I've got a sudden urge to take pictures with my phone!

Cray Zie?

2005-05-10T09:53:00.000-04:00

Why are websites talking more and more about psychological deffects... you'll go crazy from hearing so much about those. Schizophrenia, psychopathy, sociopathy, autism, asperger, etc. well i've been hyperlinked to wikipedia's on all.

The funny thing is i personally found traits that i would identify with on all or more of those wiki's, i found that in itself crazy, so i applied it to other people i know and guess what? We're all crazy. That sucks. I guess i envy those people i don't know since they must be sane. I envy sanity? MUhahaha.

Or maybe even there exists no sane person, that would own, we're all sick. But... we hide 101% of our disease and live life as normal people, ya that sounds as logical as reason is. Maybe madness defines the norm for sanity. Maybe psychologist just choose a random illness to attribute to a random patient on a day of low income.

If we're all crazy, who isn't!? Maybe even those that are called crazy or have psychological anomalies were only funneled through to having that anomaly in childhood by bored parents.

But then again it's all nomenclature so there is no need to discuss this any further.

Money is God to the dumb man. I am God to all. Google is God to me.

Stranger in an ordinary land

2005-05-09T22:57:00.000-04:00

back in calgary jhs, i decided to take a sewing class for 2 semesters, i probably figured i'd get easy points like that. But i was the only guy for one semester, and my arch-nemesis was my partner for the other... that was fucked up.

The real meat of this story is as you've probably guessed, when i was alone with the 20 female classmates. One day the hottest girl in the school, then in my class, randomly came to sit at my table, it was one of those group tables that sit 6-8 and mine was always empty, only i sat there once the guy left the class. Well she sits there right next to me, i was sitting in the lower left corner, she was on the left side. She sits there 5 minutes and i just keep on sewing my fabric basketball, so she put's her legs on the table right in front of my strings and needles.

Now what does any sexually enabled teenage (13-14) year old guy do when he is in such a situation? probably talk. Yep.

That same girl was in my english class, maybe that semester, or previously, or after that semester, memory fails me. I remember one time, i and my friend Dm as he desired to be called had a talk with the girl and her also hot friend. The discussion somehow randomly goes onto a discussion about bras and breast size. WTF what happened to me? why was i able then to bring that shit into a conversation with a hot chick, and now not. So anyways we talk about the size of pam anderson's boobs i spit out a random number and say that's my guess. They giggle and we keep on talking, and then i give my guess of the average boob size in the school, obviously a fraction of Pam's. I get more giggles.

So anyways i kept on sewing without reacting, i dont know if the boob story had influenced in anyway my reaction. The sad thing is i was sitting right in front of the fabric area so my view was: a basketball being sewed by me, a hot bitchy english speaking german girl to my left at less than a meter away, a secluded small enclosed area, to my right an empty long table, behind the girl a wall not too far away. That's also pretty much how the class ends.

Back in the days

2005-05-09T20:23:00.000-04:00

WHAT HAPPENED! I WAS SO GREAT!

fuck symmetry...

I'm unique.

Asymetrically blind,
asymetrically deaf,
asymetrically mute.

But entirely PURE.

I was just thinking

2005-05-08T22:40:00.000-04:00

Your mind goes blank because you dont know what to do next.
You don't know what to do next because you're not used to improvising.
You don't improvise because you plan ahead!
You plan ahead because you know your mind will go blank.

After writing the this list up top, i randomly typed "vicious circle" in google image and found the exact image i needed.

Google is GOD.

Back in my empty little corner!

2005-05-08T12:21:00.000-04:00

All warm and alone.
At least i can cure myself here!

Indifference

2005-05-08T05:11:00.000-04:00

is a sociopathy.